I have been struggling with a psychic reading addiction since I was 17. (now 24) It started when I was on horoscopes.com and I saw an ad for Keen, I decided to use it because my crush was confusing me and was curious what they'd say, I fell into a deep hole about wondering how he feels whats going on with him etc. I tapered a bit off in 2021 getting them maybe once a week or so but its been pretty consistent for the last 7 years. I have a full time job and have eaten up my bills about this.
My POI who I wanted readings on is actually my boyfriend of 3 years, so why am I still doing readings? because he's absent, totally absent, absent as in I know he loves me but he has been battling his own addiction except with drugs. he comes and goes, its been terror for me and his family. Yes I talk to him everyday, and right now hes in town again and hes withdrawing, hoping that this is the end of timeless cycle. But I wanted to say is that I would get readings to make sure hes okay, to make sure hes alive, if i havent heard from him, etc.
Of course I want to stop, it has eaten at my finances so much and I have a full time job making 64k a year. Im embarrassed at this age my credit cards are maxed and I take out payday or installment loans and I have no savings. I would like to say that me and my boyfriend mirror each other in a way, and he is my twin flame, but he has a ton of baggage. I have stayed with him throughout the absolute ugly but he has mentally drained me in so many ways and I have heavily contemplated if its worth it, despite wanting to be with him, it is hard. I know hes still him deep inside.
It's the rush of happiness you get after a reading just to feel satisfied, you don't want to do it but your anxiety alot of the times can get the best of you. Of course I dont really have anywhere else to talk to about this so im pretty much just ranting. The satisfaction you get is not worth your bank account, not worth your money, and your future no matter how old you are. If you are new to psychics please stop. In the last 7 years ive probably spent atleast over 60K in total. and I've been able to weed out the good advisors from the fraud ones. Ive talked to hundreds all over types of sites, I talk to ONE strictly on bitwine who is amazing and reads my bf to an absolute T. but this makes it even harder to stop but I will.
Ive hit rock bottom now as I cant take out anymore loans, until I pay the others off (when I get paid next). I'll tell you this, addiction is real and it doesn't have to manifest in just drugs/alcohol it can also be things like psychics too. I have put a big financial burden on myself but it ends today.
If you're struggling whatever the reason is, I know its hard, its fucking horribly hard, but every minute, every hour and everyday counts towards it. It will get better, and if anyone is wondering anything let me know or going through something similar let me know too,
u got this.