I want to quit

[dragonflyer]

I hear you. Most of the predictions are just guess work. They just keep feeding you the hope so you don't hate them and might keep coming back. But I would have to say, there are times that they just don't want to make you more upset by delivering the bad news when you were anxious and depressed already. Instead they give you an antidote to release the anxiety temporally. Eventually, we need take control of our own lives.
There was one psychic I have been talking to and trusted for a long time, until one day I realized she kept feeding me the fairytale. I tested her with a guy who was creepy and had been spying on me on social media. She told me there was a long term potential with this person. At that moment I realized every time I asked about someone, she would tell me it was a beautiful connection and it was divine love at the beginning. As time goes by, if things didn't turn out the way she predicted or show positive improvements, she would tell me the guy had moved on. Actually that was when my POI started coming back. You don't know for how many times I wanted to write angry reviews to confront her. But I stopped myself. I chose not to jeopardize her business and let karma find its own way. I would love to believe she didn't have evil intention to hurt me, as she did provide some good advices along the way.
Now looking back, I understand why I needed those readings when I was down and I understand myself better. I appreciate myself for not losing hope for myself or life, and still trying to pull myself up from the ground during those difficult moments. And I know how to use readings better and, of course, less.
Good luck to you. Sometimes pain is the best and fastest way to encourage us to make a change!

Hi guys - today I held back from a reading bc I was feeling very low and depressed. Honestly, the good thing is I don’t trust anyone anymore. I know I need to create my own path. I went through the steps in my head - I was miserable - they’d probably tell me everything would be ok and that I’d marry my terrible POI who I am starting to despise/ slowly forget. They’d tell me I’d get a job tomorrow. I don’t want to pay to hear the fairytale. In fact, if anything, I really want to call one or two of them and call them out on the flip-flopping and show them that every single prediction to date hasn’t happened so what on earth are they predicting future garbage for. Sorry, I’m just frustrated and upset and mad. I don’t know how people can lead you on like that, make money off of you and are able to sleep at night - pure delusion.

[sai07]

I thought I would give everyone an update of where I am. It has been an extremely rocky road.

So let me start by saying I don't think that any of the readers I talk to at this point know what will happen in my situation. Been off of readers for about a week.

I had a binge recently b/c a friend of 1.5 years who talked to me nearly everyday ghosted me and it was very emotionally distressing. Not having POI around and losing my close friend was a very big emotional disturbance. At this point I have accepted the situation for what it is. I don't think my friend will be in contact with me and for whatever reason, I am going to respect their decision. I don't know what the reason for the ghosting was- it's been everything from they're busy, they owe someone money, there's a love interest, there's an ex, they are sick - every reader had something different to say and I am tired. I have tried my best to reach out over the past 2-3 months now and it is what it is.

Re POI, still very much in love with him and still very much out of contact. I cannot go back to readers for false hope.

It is very tempting to talk to someone therapeutically about this but I have lost hope over these two people being in my life as a permanent fixture. It is what it is and it's hard but going through it alone and I am sure in a few months I will be OK.

[Sasha414]

For me it's a spiritual journey and a very helpful resource, so I didn't block it out completely. But I have been in your shoes many times and finally what worked for me is sticking to one (actually two) readers. They were both the only too I felt compassion from. So to wean myself off, I spent more time shadow journaling, writing, drawing, and when I did these things I wrote about the things I would deserve and desire. It helped a lot and may seem like nothing but I now have it under control and again for my it's a growth spiritually for me, so I keep it around.
I'm sorry you feel so lost. I hope you find what works for you.

[Mina]

Thanks for the update … and apologies for the novel or if long winded

If I may I think you’re going to all or nothing/black and white/absolute thinking… because I do it too! Or at least this how I relate to this. Also congratulations on going so long without a psychic.

Again be kind and gentle to yourself!

Gentle.
Bring in this soft sprinkly gentle kindness  acceptance of yourself. All that intensity and care is not a force to “take away” from them- but REFOCUS it back to you.

AND also because this does helps see and feel your value.

So you miss and love your friend and ex. That’s okay! Take the stigma of what you should or shouldn’t/be or feel- aside. Put all the stigma, personal meaning of what it means about you- with kindness. But see if you can observe what you’re making it mean about you; and then gently touch that part of you. I forget I don’t think my thoughts; I first feel them; I embody the sensation of my feelings, then thoughts along with the feelings of rejection… so remember to work backwards. Easier said than done, but it is helpful. So from the embodiment of rejection I am feeling broken and hallow in my chest, then the thoughts come: “men suck, I was used, how could ppl do this to me. Why would any one pick me, etc” AND then touch this part of me from a centered calm place and GENTLE (is this absolute truth- prob not)

Have you done this exercise?
If I was with (my friend/this guy) here right now what would that mean or say about me? If they were texting me right now want to hang out and be with me with me right now: What would be relieved? Or what part of me could feel like I could finally breathe? What would this say about me?
(For me: I’d feel seen, like I can breathe, I am whole. I can also feel my body smile)

And yes the cliche answer is “well how can I give that to myself?” But it isn’t so much figuring out it’s more of this acceptance, allowance for you to be okay to be you. Freely all of you.

If you could see how God values you? See how precious you are, would you be open to allow that in? (And I hope this doesn’t trigger you; I know God concept be rough one here)

I admit I can’t do it all the time… and I’m not always open to it, nor can remember. But that word “open” when rephrased to positive question affirmations “if I could be OPEN to?” it does allow the subconscious not to have so much resistance to that possibility. So putting a pause on what you’re resisting

My therapist gave me this “homework” instead of calling a psychic about: what he’s going do? What’s he thinking about me? What’s he feeling about me? When is he going to call me?
To change “he” to “me”: what am I going to do? What am I thinking about me? What am I feeling about me? When am I going to call me?

And it does have me like “oh!” It is this weird re-parent my inner dialogue.
Refocus your value back to you, with gentleness and kindness.

[sai07]

For me it's a spiritual journey and a very helpful resource, so I didn't block it out completely. But I have been in your shoes many times and finally what worked for me is sticking to one (actually two) readers. They were both the only too I felt compassion from. So to wean myself off, I spent more time shadow journaling, writing, drawing, and when I did these things I wrote about the things I would deserve and desire. It helped a lot and may seem like nothing but I now have it under control and again for my it's a growth spiritually for me, so I keep it around.
I'm sorry you feel so lost. I hope you find what works for you.

Thanks Sasha. Unfortunately I don’t have any readers that have been right about my situation. I like one reader bc he is very comforting and can help think through things at a logical level but unfortunately nothing he said has panned out. If you have a couple that work for you I’d see how it could work. Apart from a sympathetic ear, at this point nothing has worked. And that’s ok I guess. Ty for your response. I agree the all or nothing approach has not seemed to work for me. I’m having an off-day today. I’m glad you are in a better place.

[sai07]

Thanks for the update … and apologies for the novel or if long winded

If I may I think you’re going to all or nothing/black and white/absolute thinking… because I do it too! Or at least this how I relate to this. Also congratulations on going so long without a psychic.

Again be kind and gentle to yourself!

Gentle.
Bring in this soft sprinkly gentle kindness  acceptance of yourself. All that intensity and care is not a force to “take away” from them- but REFOCUS it back to you.

AND also because this does helps see and feel your value.

So you miss and love your friend and ex. That’s okay! Take the stigma of what you should or shouldn’t/be or feel- aside. Put all the stigma, personal meaning of what it means about you- with kindness. But see if you can observe what you’re making it mean about you; and then gently touch that part of you. I forget I don’t think my thoughts; I first feel them; I embody the sensation of my feelings, then thoughts along with the feelings of rejection… so remember to work backwards. Easier said than done, but it is helpful. So from the embodiment of rejection I am feeling broken and hallow in my chest, then the thoughts come: “men suck, I was used, how could ppl do this to me. Why would any one pick me, etc” AND then touch this part of me from a centered calm place and GENTLE (is this absolute truth- prob not)

Have you done this exercise?
If I was with (my friend/this guy) here right now what would that mean or say about me? If they were texting me right now want to hang out and be with me with me right now: What would be relieved? Or what part of me could feel like I could finally breathe? What would this say about me?
(For me: I’d feel seen, like I can breathe, I am whole. I can also feel my body smile)

And yes the cliche answer is “well how can I give that to myself?” But it isn’t so much figuring out it’s more of this acceptance, allowance for you to be okay to be you. Freely all of you.

If you could see how God values you? See how precious you are, would you be open to allow that in? (And I hope this doesn’t trigger you; I know God concept be rough one here)

I admit I can’t do it all the time… and I’m not always open to it, nor can remember. But that word “open” when rephrased to positive question affirmations “if I could be OPEN to?” it does allow the subconscious not to have so much resistance to that possibility. So putting a pause on what you’re resisting

My therapist gave me this “homework” instead of calling a psychic about: what he’s going do? What’s he thinking about me? What’s he feeling about me? When is he going to call me?
To change “he” to “me”: what am I going to do? What am I thinking about me? What am I feeling about me? When am I going to call me?

And it does have me like “oh!” It is this weird re-parent my inner dialogue.
Refocus your value back to you, with gentleness and kindness.

Thanks Mina. Yes, I am still taking a faith-based approach. I would be lying if I said I am not praying for both of these people to come back into my life, but I also wonder if the way they were removed was God telling me to move on. I feel extremely lost and confused. It’s great that you found a therapist that can you talk through this with. I feel embarrassed telling anyone I have an addiction problem. I am hurting and sometimes feel like reading out to one or two psychics but I think at this point any false hope would be extremely damaging to the progress I have made with no contact. As I said, it’s a very confusing and challenging period. Thanks for the exercise - will try it - sorry for my lack of enthusiasm, feeling depressed today. But thanks x

[jackY]

We got you, Sai. Reach out any time.

Thanks for the update … and apologies for the novel or if long winded

If I may I think you’re going to all or nothing/black and white/absolute thinking… because I do it too! Or at least this how I relate to this. Also congratulations on going so long without a psychic.

Again be kind and gentle to yourself!

Gentle.
Bring in this soft sprinkly gentle kindness  acceptance of yourself. All that intensity and care is not a force to “take away” from them- but REFOCUS it back to you.

AND also because this does helps see and feel your value.

So you miss and love your friend and ex. That’s okay! Take the stigma of what you should or shouldn’t/be or feel- aside. Put all the stigma, personal meaning of what it means about you- with kindness. But see if you can observe what you’re making it mean about you; and then gently touch that part of you. I forget I don’t think my thoughts; I first feel them; I embody the sensation of my feelings, then thoughts along with the feelings of rejection… so remember to work backwards. Easier said than done, but it is helpful. So from the embodiment of rejection I am feeling broken and hallow in my chest, then the thoughts come: “men suck, I was used, how could ppl do this to me. Why would any one pick me, etc” AND then touch this part of me from a centered calm place and GENTLE (is this absolute truth- prob not)

Have you done this exercise?
If I was with (my friend/this guy) here right now what would that mean or say about me? If they were texting me right now want to hang out and be with me with me right now: What would be relieved? Or what part of me could feel like I could finally breathe? What would this say about me?
(For me: I’d feel seen, like I can breathe, I am whole. I can also feel my body smile)

And yes the cliche answer is “well how can I give that to myself?” But it isn’t so much figuring out it’s more of this acceptance, allowance for you to be okay to be you. Freely all of you.

If you could see how God values you? See how precious you are, would you be open to allow that in? (And I hope this doesn’t trigger you; I know God concept be rough one here)

I admit I can’t do it all the time… and I’m not always open to it, nor can remember. But that word “open” when rephrased to positive question affirmations “if I could be OPEN to?” it does allow the subconscious not to have so much resistance to that possibility. So putting a pause on what you’re resisting

My therapist gave me this “homework” instead of calling a psychic about: what he’s going do? What’s he thinking about me? What’s he feeling about me? When is he going to call me?
To change “he” to “me”: what am I going to do? What am I thinking about me? What am I feeling about me? When am I going to call me?

And it does have me like “oh!” It is this weird re-parent my inner dialogue.
Refocus your value back to you, with gentleness and kindness.

Thanks Mina. Yes, I am still taking a faith-based approach. I would be lying if I said I am not praying for both of these people to come back into my life, but I also wonder if the way they were removed was God telling me to move on. I feel extremely lost and confused. It’s great that you found a therapist that can you talk through this with. I feel embarrassed telling anyone I have an addiction problem. I am hurting and sometimes feel like reading out to one or two psychics but I think at this point any false hope would be extremely damaging to the progress I have made with no contact. As I said, it’s a very confusing and challenging period. Thanks for the exercise - will try it - sorry for my lack of enthusiasm, feeling depressed today. But thanks x

[sai07]

We got you, Sai. Reach out any time.

Thanks for the update … and apologies for the novel or if long winded

If I may I think you’re going to all or nothing/black and white/absolute thinking… because I do it too! Or at least this how I relate to this. Also congratulations on going so long without a psychic.

Again be kind and gentle to yourself!

Gentle.
Bring in this soft sprinkly gentle kindness  acceptance of yourself. All that intensity and care is not a force to “take away” from them- but REFOCUS it back to you.

AND also because this does helps see and feel your value.

So you miss and love your friend and ex. That’s okay! Take the stigma of what you should or shouldn’t/be or feel- aside. Put all the stigma, personal meaning of what it means about you- with kindness. But see if you can observe what you’re making it mean about you; and then gently touch that part of you. I forget I don’t think my thoughts; I first feel them; I embody the sensation of my feelings, then thoughts along with the feelings of rejection… so remember to work backwards. Easier said than done, but it is helpful. So from the embodiment of rejection I am feeling broken and hallow in my chest, then the thoughts come: “men suck, I was used, how could ppl do this to me. Why would any one pick me, etc” AND then touch this part of me from a centered calm place and GENTLE (is this absolute truth- prob not)

Have you done this exercise?
If I was with (my friend/this guy) here right now what would that mean or say about me? If they were texting me right now want to hang out and be with me with me right now: What would be relieved? Or what part of me could feel like I could finally breathe? What would this say about me?
(For me: I’d feel seen, like I can breathe, I am whole. I can also feel my body smile)

And yes the cliche answer is “well how can I give that to myself?” But it isn’t so much figuring out it’s more of this acceptance, allowance for you to be okay to be you. Freely all of you.

If you could see how God values you? See how precious you are, would you be open to allow that in? (And I hope this doesn’t trigger you; I know God concept be rough one here)

I admit I can’t do it all the time… and I’m not always open to it, nor can remember. But that word “open” when rephrased to positive question affirmations “if I could be OPEN to?” it does allow the subconscious not to have so much resistance to that possibility. So putting a pause on what you’re resisting

My therapist gave me this “homework” instead of calling a psychic about: what he’s going do? What’s he thinking about me? What’s he feeling about me? When is he going to call me?
To change “he” to “me”: what am I going to do? What am I thinking about me? What am I feeling about me? When am I going to call me?

And it does have me like “oh!” It is this weird re-parent my inner dialogue.
Refocus your value back to you, with gentleness and kindness.

Thanks Mina. Yes, I am still taking a faith-based approach. I would be lying if I said I am not praying for both of these people to come back into my life, but I also wonder if the way they were removed was God telling me to move on. I feel extremely lost and confused. It’s great that you found a therapist that can you talk through this with. I feel embarrassed telling anyone I have an addiction problem. I am hurting and sometimes feel like reading out to one or two psychics but I think at this point any false hope would be extremely damaging to the progress I have made with no contact. As I said, it’s a very confusing and challenging period. Thanks for the exercise - will try it - sorry for my lack of enthusiasm, feeling depressed today. But thanks x

Thanks Jacky x appreciate you

[jackY]

Right back at 'cha, woman. xo

We got you, Sai. Reach out any time.

Thanks for the update … and apologies for the novel or if long winded

If I may I think you’re going to all or nothing/black and white/absolute thinking… because I do it too! Or at least this how I relate to this. Also congratulations on going so long without a psychic.

Again be kind and gentle to yourself!

Gentle.
Bring in this soft sprinkly gentle kindness  acceptance of yourself. All that intensity and care is not a force to “take away” from them- but REFOCUS it back to you.

AND also because this does helps see and feel your value.

So you miss and love your friend and ex. That’s okay! Take the stigma of what you should or shouldn’t/be or feel- aside. Put all the stigma, personal meaning of what it means about you- with kindness. But see if you can observe what you’re making it mean about you; and then gently touch that part of you. I forget I don’t think my thoughts; I first feel them; I embody the sensation of my feelings, then thoughts along with the feelings of rejection… so remember to work backwards. Easier said than done, but it is helpful. So from the embodiment of rejection I am feeling broken and hallow in my chest, then the thoughts come: “men suck, I was used, how could ppl do this to me. Why would any one pick me, etc” AND then touch this part of me from a centered calm place and GENTLE (is this absolute truth- prob not)

Have you done this exercise?
If I was with (my friend/this guy) here right now what would that mean or say about me? If they were texting me right now want to hang out and be with me with me right now: What would be relieved? Or what part of me could feel like I could finally breathe? What would this say about me?
(For me: I’d feel seen, like I can breathe, I am whole. I can also feel my body smile)

And yes the cliche answer is “well how can I give that to myself?” But it isn’t so much figuring out it’s more of this acceptance, allowance for you to be okay to be you. Freely all of you.

If you could see how God values you? See how precious you are, would you be open to allow that in? (And I hope this doesn’t trigger you; I know God concept be rough one here)

I admit I can’t do it all the time… and I’m not always open to it, nor can remember. But that word “open” when rephrased to positive question affirmations “if I could be OPEN to?” it does allow the subconscious not to have so much resistance to that possibility. So putting a pause on what you’re resisting

My therapist gave me this “homework” instead of calling a psychic about: what he’s going do? What’s he thinking about me? What’s he feeling about me? When is he going to call me?
To change “he” to “me”: what am I going to do? What am I thinking about me? What am I feeling about me? When am I going to call me?

And it does have me like “oh!” It is this weird re-parent my inner dialogue.
Refocus your value back to you, with gentleness and kindness.

Thanks Mina. Yes, I am still taking a faith-based approach. I would be lying if I said I am not praying for both of these people to come back into my life, but I also wonder if the way they were removed was God telling me to move on. I feel extremely lost and confused. It’s great that you found a therapist that can you talk through this with. I feel embarrassed telling anyone I have an addiction problem. I am hurting and sometimes feel like reading out to one or two psychics but I think at this point any false hope would be extremely damaging to the progress I have made with no contact. As I said, it’s a very confusing and challenging period. Thanks for the exercise - will try it - sorry for my lack of enthusiasm, feeling depressed today. But thanks x

Thanks Jacky x appreciate you

[sai07]

Hi everyone - just an update - so as you know, I have been cutting back and I am proud to say that I have not been going back to any readers that were wrong and I have not been pursuing new readers, no matter how glowing the reviews are (here or on Keen). Kindly don't suggest anyone to me. I am off that crack. So I feel from that POV my addiction is under control.

The part that's still sucky is I am talking to one reader, it does feel more like therapy at this point but I really don't like the amount I am spending. He has one prediction that is pending for end of Aug. He was nice enough to say not to spend money and to wait until end of Aug for prediction to pass. I don't think his prediction will pass and I have told him numerous times - what I am seeing and what he is saying is not lining up. It would literally be a miracle if it happened and he is "99%" sure of it but yeah, I have legit concerns bc previous predictions of his have not come to fruition, but what he explains to me from a personality and feelings perspective resonates. So my aim is to go reading-free until the end of Aug and see if any of this pans out. If it does not....I will not be going back to this reader for predictions...but I am also not sure how to deal with the emotional fall-out that will happen. You know when you're secretly really hoping the reader is right and then it does not happen? It is such a blow. I am not sure how I will manage it. I am hoping I don't fall into a binge. Maybe I do what 'normal' people do and just go through the emotions and rely on God. It is far too easy to reach out to a psychic and I worry I will relapse.

Re: friend that went MIA, I have accepted that it is what it is. Same with POI. My intention is to dip my feet back into the dating pool in a few weeks via the apps (which I detest), and this time I am not going to readers for any updates on men. I need a fresh start. If someone is not giving me the time or day or mixed signals, I will move on. Not emotionally invest.

[sai07]

Update time:

The progress: Not reading with any new readers, blocked a couple advisors - even the ones where a couple predictions came to pass. They gave me the 'ick' and their predictions continued to shift, some 180 in nature, so I used my judgement and just took them out of the pool completely. It's been great not being tempted to read with someone new or having a 'favourites' list on Keen. I feel somewhat liberated.

The not-progress: Reading with one reader only but had a lot of anxiety this month so reached out to him more than I liked His prediction did not fully pan out for end of Aug so...I am a bit skeptical...he said to give it a couple more days...but ...it just feels like a long-shot. He is good with empathy and current situation/ feelings and I enjoy reading with him. However, if the prediction doesn't pass this month...I don't have much of a reason to go back.

I have a bit of credit card debt that I am going to try to get out of this month. My primary concern for cutting back has been financial.

Guys, I feel I can do it. I feel I can be free of this addiction. I am literally one advisor away from freedom. I just need more will power.

[TulipsAndSunflowers]

Good luck sai07! You can do this!!

[sai07]

Good luck sai07! You can do this!!

Thanks girlie! x

[sai07]

Hi guys!

The last advisor - the one that predicted a major change at the end of Aug, that prediction is now going into Sept. I don't feel good having spent money today. I feel terrible tbh bc there was no new information, my anxiety just got the best of me. It is not on the advisor but on me. This advisor is actually quite likeable but at the end of the day, I have to do what is best for me and my life. And I want to start building my own intuition again. I am having a hard time seeing the prediction come to life and most of all, I need to pay off the credit card stuff.

So this time, instead of giving myself some grace, I want to really stick to going without a reading. I was reading it takes 2-3 months to break a habit (21 days is actually a myth and perhaps achievable with simpler vices). I don't know if announcing it here is stupid but I am struggling and it is addiction and I am ready to try again with more rigour. I want my life back. I want financial freedom. I want to be able to afford a home and vacations and trips and be comfortable in retirement. Most of all, I want control of myself back.

[jackY]

HUGS, sai!!! PM me if you want to chat. xo