Author Topic: Need your point of view regarding a text...  (Read 17349 times)

Offline Alchemist13

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #15 on: May 19, 2017, 10:48:37 PM »
Yep too friendly and wants more it seems, left it open for her to come back,.

Offline truthseeker87

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #16 on: May 19, 2017, 11:22:21 PM »
Way too friendly. Should have told you about it. Sending a kiss is flirty. They are planning to do it again. He has already shown interest in her, her in him.

Run like the wind, girl, and don't look back.

Amb

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #17 on: May 19, 2017, 11:51:22 PM »
Run like the wind, girl, and don't look back.

Ditto to this!!!!

Offline njlady

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #18 on: May 20, 2017, 12:25:01 AM »

I'm trying to tell myself that he hasn't cheated but at least I saved myself from being with someone who seemed to want starting to double date and then pick his favorite (I hate double dating).


Yeah, he was going to double date if she had shown interest in having him back. 

You are doing the right thing.


Offline Sooshi

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #19 on: May 20, 2017, 04:34:03 PM »
So you guys don't think he is just keeping her around as a plan B in case it doesn't work out with Love-33? That he's definitely going to try to date her at the same time? Just seeing if that's the consensus here. I could be naive.

stargazer

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #20 on: May 20, 2017, 05:02:05 PM »
So you guys don't think he is just keeping her around as a plan B in case it doesn't work out with Love-33? That he's definitely going to try to date her at the same time? Just seeing if that's the consensus here. I could be naive.
i think he was trying to have his cake and eat it too, if he could get away with it.

Offline Luckystar

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #21 on: May 20, 2017, 05:23:51 PM »
Even if he was just keeping his options open, he shouldn't have hid it from her. That in addition to buying her dinner and drinks and suggesting another meeting....it's enough for me not to trust the guy. I'd be out

Offline Love-33

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #22 on: May 20, 2017, 07:05:35 PM »
Even if he was just keeping his options open, he shouldn't have hid it from her. That in addition to buying her dinner and drinks and suggesting another meeting....it's enough for me not to trust the guy. I'd be out

Exactly.
I mean would you guys like your guy to invite a girl out for drinks and dinner? And then tell her they should go out again? If you don't mind, then you're weird lol. He is definitely still interested in this girl

Offline Love-33

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #23 on: May 20, 2017, 07:08:00 PM »
So you guys don't think he is just keeping her around as a plan B in case it doesn't work out with Love-33? That he's definitely going to try to date her at the same time? Just seeing if that's the consensus here. I could be naive.

So inviting someone out for drinks and dinner is not a date for you? It's definitely a date. This girl was not an old friend of his. It's different: they were dating a few months ago. Yes you're Naive lol

Offline maroonlight

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #24 on: May 20, 2017, 08:43:32 PM »
Hey I'm so sorry that happened to you. I can imagine how hurt you must be from that now. I hope you are able to heal and move on to someone who doesn't do something like that and treats you better

Offline Itsmylife

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #25 on: May 22, 2017, 11:03:59 AM »
Hey love 33, don't trust this guy ever again. If you guys were in committed relationship he has already shown his true nature. He is just probably been dating you without any serious intentions about future (sorry if I say it hard). May be it was too early for both of you to come to the next level? When I met my BF (now husband) he told me he s in touch with his ex coz she owe him money (thousands of dollars for a car loan through bank under his name). She was paying him little by little every month but could take many years.... But what he had not told me that they were regular in touch. I caught their texts. Ours was also a bit fresh relationship. He clearly said to me he cannot leave her friendship. I was so hurt. But I decided to continue relationship and also tried a bit to keep my options open or at least not too much emotionally attached to him and it took him about 6-7 months to write her a text.... Don't ever text me again my GF does not like it. Just send the money on my address. I can't hurt my GF ( I secretly read their conversations). Sometimes it takes time to built a relationship to a certain level and to bring 100% commitment to table. May be don't break up with him may be bring on the table your relationship boundaries, expectations, clear communication, specificity about being exclusive in all aspects. Emotional development does need sometime. Because this can happen in any relationship and we can't just always run from issues and breakups are not the only issues. Let him come to you and then ask him to be clear and specific. About his and yours needs. If you like him a lot try to meet up and have an open conversation
 A few months dating is still a long way to go. I am not taking his side just being how I honestly I feel. If he clearly crossed the boundaries then yes he's not a right guy but honestly your fears are correct. I would also add try meeting him face to face rather then calling. Its important to have eye contacts for such conversations. Best of luck.

Offline Love-33

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #26 on: May 22, 2017, 11:39:04 AM »
Hey love 33, don't trust this guy ever again. If you guys were in committed relationship he has already shown his true nature. He is just probably been dating you without any serious intentions about future (sorry if I say it hard). May be it was too early for both of you to come to the next level? When I met my BF (now husband) he told me he s in touch with his ex coz she owe him money (thousands of dollars for a car loan through bank under his name). She was paying him little by little every month but could take many years.... But what he had not told me that they were regular in touch. I caught their texts. Ours was also a bit fresh relationship. He clearly said to me he cannot leave her friendship. I was so hurt. But I decided to continue relationship and also tried a bit to keep my options open or at least not too much emotionally attached to him and it took him about 6-7 months to write her a text.... Don't ever text me again my GF does not like it. Just send the money on my address. I can't hurt my GF ( I secretly read their conversations). Sometimes it takes time to built a relationship to a certain level and to bring 100% commitment to table. May be don't break up with him may be bring on the table your relationship boundaries, expectations, clear communication, specificity about being exclusive in all aspects. Emotional development does need sometime. Because this can happen in any relationship and we can't just always run from issues and breakups are not the only issues. Let him come to you and then ask him to be clear and specific. About his and yours needs. If you like him a lot try to meet up and have an open conversation
 A few months dating is still a long way to go. I am not taking his side just being how I honestly I feel. If he clearly crossed the boundaries then yes he's not a right guy but honestly your fears are correct. I would also add try meeting him face to face rather then calling. Its important to have eye contacts for such conversations. Best of luck.

We met up yesterday I went to his place. Nothing happened we just talked and when he went to the bathroom he received a text message, it was her. I just looked at the screen and they are meeting up next Monday (which is a public holiday in the U.K.). He preferred to plan something with her than me.
I literally left. I just don't want to try to be with someone who is not 100% into me and is planning dates with another woman.
And he hasn't even tried to contact me afterwards except that: "you left, ok you should have said something at least. All the best"

Lovefash67

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #27 on: May 22, 2017, 12:53:29 PM »
I know this situation must be very heartbreaking for you but you should cut him off for your own good , if during that time he figures out what he wants and he comes back you can decide then if you want him. Right now it's best to love yourself and be good to yourself and eliminate things that make you feel bad or sad

stargazer

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #28 on: May 22, 2017, 01:14:28 PM »
We met up yesterday I went to his place. Nothing happened we just talked and when he went to the bathroom he received a text message, it was her. I just looked at the screen and they are meeting up next Monday (which is a public holiday in the U.K.). He preferred to plan something with her than me.
I literally left. I just don't want to try to be with someone who is not 100% into me and is planning dates with another woman.
And he hasn't even tried to contact me afterwards except that: "you left, ok you should have said something at least. All the best"
What a jerk. Leave him in the trash where he belongs.

Offline dagnytaggert27

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Re: Need your point of view regarding a text...
« Reply #29 on: May 22, 2017, 01:58:45 PM »
man, dating is hard but he isn't a jerk. Has he said he wanted to be exclusive with you? Many people date at the same time and yes it looks like you were one of two options (that you know of).

If i were you I would have just been honest and said that you saw the text from the corner of your eye and want to know where you stand because you can better use your time with someone who is more interested if he isnt.

Anyways, it's done now and you have your answer. Remember, you could also be put in that situation where you're still trying to figure out who you would rather spend your time with. It doesn't mean that they are bad people, it just means that the connection isnt strong enough, you'll find a better one :.