OMG I had to laugh out loud when I read this. The first three sentences I've heard like a trillion times. Even on Bitwine as shady as it may seem, I run from those where English is not their first language (look at all the negative or satisfactory reviews and someone has mentioned this). If they've been in the states a while they would know how to use connective words like 'at' 'to' or 'and', also, especially if their sentences are broken English and specifically when they are slooooooooow typist.
(I'm not trying to point a finger, but I know bilingual people who can speak flawless English, better than I and don't even have an accent and there are some accents I love hearing. Some like Matthew McConaughey and Penelope Cruz, I can't stand)...but that's just me.
So, so funny.
Thank you so much for the laugh.