QUESTION

[jen80]

Hi guys I would like your thoughts on this question. If a reader tells you what will happen can you actively decide to change the outcome?. In the same sense if a reader tells you that you are about to break up with your partner and the reason why, is it possible to change that? Am just wondering. I got a reading with someone a while ago and she told me that I would fight with my sister and then told me steps to prevent it which I did and a fight was averted so that got me thinking. What do you guys think?.

[Truth]

well yeah. at the end of the day we are always the person taking the actual action. a reader may be able to pick up that we want to, or will want to break up with someone. but it's up to you to pull the trigger. at that point, it gets into that weird zone about whether you allowed or prevented what the reader said you'd do. however, when you have insight into the situation you can make clearer choice, and i think thats why readings are really helpful. when the reader is looking at the OTHER person and making predictions i guess it's similar, except the other person is just following along the energy that is already there.

there is a quote from The Matrix that i think is good. it's when Neo knocks over the vase when he's talking to the Oracle. she says something like
"what's really going to bake your noodle later on is, would you still have broken it if I hadn't said anything?"

ideally though, the reading is supposed to empower you with clarity so you can make better decisions.

[Synergy]

I agree with Truth.  Ultimately, you have control of your life.   The last reading I had, the reader told me that she could give me paths and tips on how to achieve my desired outcome.  She emphasized my own power when it comes to achieving my desired goals, whether they be in love, work, or any other area of life.  I don't knock it, but I'm not a big fan of manifestation... I don't know why, I just never have been, so that's not what I'm talking about.  I just think that you have to be true to yourself no matter what a reader tells you. 

When I was calling about C, so many readers told me to agree to be his friend.  Well, I didn't want to be his friend!! I couldn't be his friend while he was out partying with different women every night and waking up naked on his sofa after we had split.  I knew I couldn't put myself through that. I flat out told him I couldn't be his friend and even "unfriended" him on Facebook.  So, yes, maybe I changed my outcome, but so what?  Yes, sometimes we have to make sacrifices for the ones we love, but we can't make sacrifices that essentially compromise who you are at your core.  You have to be true to yourself, first and foremost, before anyone can love you. 

Readings should be used as a tool... they should be viewed objectively.  A reader may tell you you're doomed.  Some readers have told me I'm going to get pregnant this year.  Guess what?  I'm definitely going to take measures for that NOT to happen.  Why?  Because I do have control over my life and my actions.  Readings can help us decide what actions we will take, but I don't think they are the end all, be all.  You can't lose your identity, your desires, or your power as a result of these readings. 

I think I feel better about readings when I think of the predicted outcome as an option.  If the reader gives me guidance, I have to really ask myself if I am capable of following through on that advice.  If not, then I just can't take it.  I don't think anyone should feel defeated simply because a reader says it's over.  You have to do what you think is best.  I also think, though, that we should make certain decisions based on REALITY.  If a guy hasn't spoken to you in years, maybe it's time to move on.  Who knows?  He may come back in 10 years, but there's no reason to put your life on hold and agonize as you wait for his return.  Don't wait. Live.

Ok, sorry, I think I tackled 20 issues in this post, but I've been through the ringer with readings. Haha.  In the end, I realized that as much as I love psychics, I can't take these readings as seriously as I used to. 

[loops77]

Assuming that the reader is actually gifted, I think some things can be avoided. I believe these things are small things, though. Fights, traffic accidents, choosing where to eat. Certain things in life will happen to you..destined things will happen. So if you were destined to have a huge fight with your sister...it will happen no matter how you try to avoid it. The problem  is that we don't always know what is destined or not.

Saying that, I don't think free will is the opposite of destiny. They are intricately intertwined in some cases.

I've had readers that have told me to "be his friend" until he gets it together. I think at that point, they are just giving advice and not reading anything psychic. They should have clearly seen that there would be no "friendship" bt us if I can't be with the person in the way that I wanted. Why not say that this is a no go instead? Rarely does settling get you what you want in the end, either....

[Truth]

i guess i think about this question like Astrology. since i've studied this for so long it sounds like how i try to approach this.
as an Astrologer, you should be able to tell people when fights are likely, or when you will feel like breaking things off, etc. however, that energy could be fleeting. the job, at that point, is to guide the person to understand that it could be an impulsive decision and the choice is theirs to ride it out or react to the energy and act.

[jen80]

Wow you guys are so deep and smart. Thanks it all makes sense. Am so sorry I keep opening topics but thank you guys for replying. Jen

[hope4love]

Our actions or lack of will most definitely affect outcomes.  I'm very wary when readers 'forewarn' me of an event, especially in the love arena.  While I won't go into detail, this particular forewarning I've gotten from a reader is good to know BUT I know what I will do if that situation presents itself.  She made it sound like I'd fall into the situation without any say in it.

I will say this reader was right about a forewarning regarding an illness with a family member and it came to pass later that year.  (although I had an inkling of something as well; she just confirmed it) Maybe that situation was much easier to read, who knows.
Regardless, we need to make the choices that we feel are best for us, no matter what a reader says. 

[Luckystar]

Certain things in life will happen to you..destined things will happen. So if you were destined to have a huge fight with your sister...it will happen no matter how you try to avoid it. The problem  is that we don't always know what is destined or not 

Loops i couldn't have said it better myself. Do any readers mentioned on the board specifically predict destined events?

[Truth]

Our actions or lack of will most definitely affect outcomes.  I'm very wary when readers 'forewarn' me of an event, especially in the love arena.  While I won't go into detail, this particular forewarning I've gotten from a reader is good to know BUT I know what I will do if that situation presents itself.  She made it sound like I'd fall into the situation without any say in it.

I will say this reader was right about a forewarning regarding an illness with a family member and it came to pass later that year.  (although I had an inkling of something as well; she just confirmed it) Maybe that situation was much easier to read, who knows.
Regardless, we need to make the choices that we feel are best for us, no matter what a reader says.

the first instance you mentioned has to do with a decision to allow or prevent the circumstance.
the second instance (the illness) is not controllable, unless it's an illness that could have been prevented by some lifestyle changes. even then it would probably be difficult to stop something if it's already too far.

i agree with the destiny thing, but i don't think a fight is ever a "destiny" situation. fights are 2 people actively involved. it doesn't just blindside you one day and you are a helpless victim. this is, assuming you have control over the way you speak to and act to people. if you don't then yeah, you'd continue on that path of fighting with someone. i understand there are times that others can just come to us and attack us or try to pick a fight, but you have control over letting it get to that point - by reacting, yelling, etc.

destined events, in my opinion, are ones you don't really have control over. death, sickness, someone walking into your life in some miraculous way, some other possible examples that i can't think of.
inevitable events are another story, i'd say. but again, it's not guaranteed to be inevitable if it's something you still have control over. obviously you can't force someone to not break up with you, or to be with you in the first place, but if it's something you have a hand in creating then there's still the possibility the situation could go either way.

[loops77]

Certain things in life will happen to you..destined things will happen. So if you were destined to have a huge fight with your sister...it will happen no matter how you try to avoid it. The problem  is that we don't always know what is destined or not 

Loops i couldn't have said it better myself. Do any readers mentioned on the board specifically predict destined events?

I think they all do..they just don't know it or see it in that way. Almost every decent reader saw the gemini guy that was supposed to enter my life. Even the readers I didn't like and those not on keen. Looking at my natal chart, I see now why he is around. Anyway, what I use to do was compare the info I got from readings with astrology and numerology...especially if different psychics were saying the same unique thing. This let me know something was supposed to happen.

[hope4love]

nm

[loops77]

If I may add that yes, I do believe that readers can foresee something that is destined to come your way. 
However, just because you're destined to meet someone that doesn't necessarily translate into a long term happily ever relationship. 
If two people are destined to meet, then they're destined to meet BUT what kind of relationship they become involved in depends on the choices they make. 
And yes, if someone's time will end then that's a destiny thing too, imho.

Absolutely agree. From what my chart tells me, I won't marry the Gemini male. Does that make him any less important in my life? No.

[hope4love]

nm