I have a not so good update on my POI,
To give a little background, his son and my son are best friends. He was in a relationship that was toxic and she's in jail for domestic abuse. They broke up early part of June. He and I started being friendly and became very close. Late July we stepped over the line to friends with benefits. All along he told me he wasn't ready for a relationship and wanted to take it a day at a time and let it just be. I was ok with that for a while because I could tell he was starting to have feelings and of course, so was I. He was also hanging out with a woman who he was not attracted to at all but enjoyed her company. She brought over food all the time and obviously had ulterior motives which I saw but he didn't. Fast forward a little and I started to have more and more feelings. We connected very deep and would talk for hours about us and relationships etc. So, early September, I had an insecure moment and went off on him thinking he was lying to me and using me. It wasn't nice. I told him the next day when we talked that I realized I still had a lot of fear and insecurities plus trust issues because of my past relationship and realized I still needed to do some work on me. From that moment on, he became silent. I left him alone. I finally asked him if we could talk 2 weeks later. He then told me he only wanted friends, good friends and that the timing was just off. He couldn't do the emotional stuff. So, I left him alone again. He had told me early on that he had signed up on a dating site but thought it was a joke and rarely got on there. Well, in the last week, I found the site he was on and he's active. Every single advisor told me this guy had deep feelings for me, that he loved me but needed time, he was confused that he wanted a relationship but just couldn't right now. Give it 2 weeks and he'll start moving forward they said. All of them said middle of September to Mid October. I've read with every advisor mentioned on this board. I've been obsessing and calling ALOT. I've spent more money than I'm willing to admit and am quite embarassed actually. I've read with every single one of the "best" ones and they all said the same thing.
Today, I found out that he was actually on a date this evening. Well, that was it. I texted him and told him he was an asshole like my past boyfriend and even though he knew my fears and insecurities, he still did what the other asshole did. He fed me a bunch of bullshit lies about how he adores me etc but couldn't do a relationship and deal with the emotions only to get in my pants. I then blocked him from my phone.
There were 3 people out of at least 20 advisors that I spoke to that said there would be no forward movement. Those were:
Rose of Angels - he doesn't want to be deeply involved with anyone and to let him go
Queen of Cups 18 - he was crazy about me and I was the perfect woman for him, but was focusing on work and finances and couldn't give anything to me and there would no forward movement
Scott Angel - he was brutal but he laid it out there. I just refused to listen to him because he was the ONLY one that said what the real truth was: He was interested but relationship was not his focus. If someone is along for the ride, it's ok. He was on the recovery road and wouldn't rush. He was good to enjoy me but not fully invested. Good for casual dating but nothing more. Finances were his biggest challenge. He would take me or leave me. He saw me as killing time. Earliest to see any change would be the holiday's if I'm available. He enjoyed me because i was light and easy and no drama. He said there could be something more if he was emotionally healthy but to open myself to not waiting and I deserved more. He said he would come back around guaranteed and to put it on pause
Here's the flat out honest truth. I knew in my gut that what Scott said was true. I knew it before I started calling. I just didn't listen.
This is my third round with psychic readings. The first round, I called maybe 7 or 8 but only once. I didn't obsess over the readings. I was borderline obsessing about the man, but not the readings. We had a strong connection and I just couldn't shake him. All of the psychics said he would come back in the Spring of 2013. He did. March 1 and we officially started dating March 25. We were together 2 years.
The 2nd round was last December when I met a guy that again, I couldn't shake. I did call alot of psychics but not nearly what I have been calling. Every advisor said he was coming back and that he was scared, or busy or had family issues etc. The reality was he met a girl in March and is still dating her.
And now round 3 of which you know the ending,
Here's my take on this. Obviously, I choose the wrong men. Lesson #1 Any man that turns his back and leaves, let him GO. Do NOT hang on to them. Do NOT call psychic after psychic to see if he's coming back. If a man doesn't give you the time of day, he's NOT coming back. If a man shuts the door, he's NOT coming back, If a man lies to you, cheats on you etc, he's never going to change, do NOT TAKE him back! LET HIM GO! Lesson #2 IF you call psychics, continue to live your life and don't obsess. Let it GO and live your life. If the man is going to come back and they say so, then he will but ONLY if you let him go. This is the difference in round 1 compared to rounds 2 and 3. I honestly, 100% believe, that calling all the time, daily in my instance, prevents them from coming back because the energy is pushing them away. I could be wrong, but the proof is in the pudding. Lesson #3 If all psychics say the same thing and you have one or two that tell you different, go with the one that is telling you different. I don't understand it and can't make sense out of it but I'll be damned if it's not a fact. With round 2, there was one or 2 that said he wasn't coming back. The rest said he was.
I have some suggestions to do in place of readings. I've done both and they helped me and I plan on going back to doing these things. #1 Manifesting/Law of Attraction Lanie Stevens has an awesome way of doing this, however, the key is to learn to let go. She got her ex back after a year of doing her technique on him. But she lived her life as she was doing it. She has a forum and the women are awesome. You can do her technique on any area of your life #2 Rory Raye has some amazing relationship CD's. She gives some awesome suggestions and tools on how to deal with men to get them to basically be at your beck and call. Some of the stuff is a little out there, but for the most part, the stuff works.
Think of it this way. If we are in our own power and secure and happy in our own lives, letting go completely, working and focusing on ourselves, then we won't have any need to call a psychic to see if a man is coming back because we will be OK if he doesn't. I have let these men take my power away, my focus away from me. By doing that, I've lost alot of money, time and energy on some asshole that doesn't appreciate the amazing person that is standing in front of him. I refuse to do it ever again.
So, that's my story. I'm giving up, letting go and saying goodbye to all of the psychic bullcrap. I hope some of you that are doing what I was doing, will also take control and stop giving your power away. It's harder than hell to do. But enough is enough.
