I woke up early...too early for a Saturday...5:30 am to be exact. My stomach was in knots. Anxiety again. I got up, fed the old cat, stepped outside and was hit in the face with the heat advisory. Ugh, it wasn't going to be a good day. I logged in to check the forum and saw so many people suffering last night. It made me so sad. I went back to bed to catch more sleep hopefully.
I woke up again at 8:00 am. Had some coffee and looked around me. My youngest is with his dad, but my oldest is sleeping unconsciously as older teenagers do. There's garbage that needs to be taken out. I really need to vacuum and put away laundry. The bathroom needs a scrubbing...cat litter is stinky. Wow. I let things go.
It's easy to see the depression sometimes. What's hard is to see the good things. So I stopped. What happened that was good? Well, it's Saturday. I'm now well rested. I got an email that the college loan was preapproved. I paid my bills this month. My credit score is in the good range for once. I got a "kudos" from my boss...2 projects completed by end of business Friday, a day ahead of schedule. I have a coupon for the local ice cream place. Things could be worse. LOL
So I've decided, just for today, to have a "let it go" day. I will finish my coffee, take a shower, and get my ass in gear. It's time. Time to clean up my life. I'm logging out of social media. Turning off my notifications. I'll put my vintage records on the turntable (yes, I do have a collection of records!). I'll vacuum, take out the garbage, clean the kitty litter to some Simon and Garfunkel (dating myself). I'll prep dinner for the kids and run and get some really good ice cream after dinner. I'll be grateful that I have a house to clean, I'll be grateful that I have food in the fridge to make dinner, I'll be grateful that I have a coupon for the best ice cream in the tri-state area during a God awful heat advisory. I'll be grateful that the music will bring me joy. I'll be grateful that I was able to get out of bed, put my feet on the floor, take a deep breath, and move forward step by step.
I challenge you, especially those struggling, to have a "let it go" kind of day. Just one day. Turn if off. Unplug. Be grateful.