Lucas Lyons

[Bark angel]

Perhaps this might come off as strange, but since I am someone that has no contact with the man of my dreams, why is it you cannot feel, or do not feel you would get the acceptable answer of you asked your soul mate these questions directly?  If I could, I would always opt for information from the source rather than from a third party, as in a psychic.

It is not that I don't feel like I am in a fabulous position.  I don't know if I believe what I have been told because it was not the answer to the question that I asked.  I always ask the same thing.  I tell them that we have been having a fling for over a year and do they see this continuing in the future and is his wife or my husband suspicious.  I have even had more then one of them tell me that not only does she know she don't care and they have an understanding.  I am a women, that just rings false to me.    I guess since I didn't ask how he felt about me I was confused as to why they keep telling me that he is in love with me and is just going through a pulling back phase (he hasn't really) and he is my soul mate and things like that.   I guess knowing is feeling is something that subconsciously  I wanted to know because I find myself having deeper feeling than just friendship with him.  When it first happened I didn't expect it to keep happening for over a year.  It was supposed to be a drunken one night fling.  Now I have people telling me he loves me and I don't see any of that from him.  He makes jokes about when we leave our spouses and get married and things like that but only ever in a joking manner so I just want to know where I stand so I can make smart choices on how to proceed.

[chrys]

How am I to know if this person is my soul mate?  I never thought about it until psychics told me that he was.  When it started he was a good friend and it was a fling.  Both of us being married makes things a little more complicated than just blurting out.  " Hey Do you Love Me"  No one ever wants to be the first person to say it in any relationship out of fear that they don't feel the same way. So you sit and keep all of your feeling to yourself thinking that you are the only one with something to lose so why say anything.  Just because someone is supposed to be your soul mate doesn't makes conversations and situation easy I feel it may make them harder because you are more afraid of messing it up.  So then to build up your confidence you start calling psychics to validate you feeling or your fears and it is really a vicious circle.

[Zee]

I forgot you had the complicated situation, so just nix what I previously posted.  You are correct in your assessment about being the one to say 'I Love You' first, at least that is the issue with me, but you are still in a somewhat good position, particularly since he loves you more (if this is true). So many variables and so many complications and so little time.

have even had more then one of them tell me that not only does she know she don't care and they have an understanding.  I am a women, that just rings false to me.

I have known people whose wives and/or husbands have an understanding. This is not so much false as it isn't necessarily known amongst many couples.

Actually, I really have no advice to give, other than to give an opinion.  I'm not a fan of soulmate/twin flame. What many readers fail to say too is that because it's a soulmate/twin flame, doesn't mean you are necessarily in a relationship with that SM or TF.

Bark Angel is very right though (in my opinion) and although it is more difficult/complicated in your situation, wouldn't you still rather know now instead of down the road?  Wouldn't the hurt, hurt less if you know where things stand and not build up your hopes on nothing? This is just how I deal with things of this nature (just give it to me straight and with honesty, even the brutal kind) in how I feel about relationships. This is one of the reasons we seek out readers, because we just don't know.

We deserve better than just floating along and standing on the sidelines. We should be in the game, having picked our teams and enjoying ourselves.  This is your life - write the story how you want it to turn out.

You can always broach the subject handfuls at a time, by saying something like....so where is this flingy thingy going? ...if you did decide to leave the wifey, how'd you do it and what would you say (just to feel it out). Just keep it light and playful (men love this, as anything emotional becomes too heavy), and they get scared real quick.

Also, remember that there is truth in jest.  If you know him and understand him, perhaps it's his way of bringing up the subject of you two and feeling you out about the relationship.  He has just as much at stake (his feelings, his pride, his heart, hurting others, etc.) as you do and if you haven't been hinting at anything long term, he would feel foolish if he were the only one to place all his cards on the table.

[melancholia]

Also, remember that there is truth in jest.  If you know him and understand him, perhaps it's his way of bringing up the subject of you two and feeling you out about the relationship.  He has just as much at stake (his feelings, his pride, his heart, hurting others, etc.) as you do and if you haven't been hinting at anything long term, he would feel foolish if he were the only one to place all his cards on the table.

I agree with this...I mean, if you think that you might want to pursue this as a long-term, permanent relationship, maybe joke back with him that you might just have to take him up on those hints he's throwing your way one day?

[chrys]

I had a reading with him yesterday evening.  Seemed really nice and gave me a few dates to look at.  He didn't pick up on the fact both of us were married so I don't know if that means anythings.  He did send me a follow up email.  I have copied it here.  I have changed the names.  He did hit something on the head.  He said I have been thinking of leaving my spouse and I have but not because of my fling. My fling is probably the only reason I am still in my marriage because it gives me a little happiness in my life over the last year.

Hello, it was a pleasure to speak with you.

I do see you and **** together.  I feel he has been so twisted up by his feelings for you and what to do.  Although I don't feel a connection to your spouses by either of you, I feel these circumstances have contributed to **** being so twisted up in his emotions for you.

I see things getting better and him being clearer about what he needs to do.  Look for things to take a positive turn around the 16th of January when I see him opening up to you about his feelings and that he wants to be with you.  I feel this will lead to you separating from your spouses in April.  I feel you have some plans for this already, even if you haven't acted on those plans yet. 

I feel the depth of feelings and the effort to be with one another will result in a long term commitment for the two of you.

Have a wonderful and blessed evening and a very Happy New Year.

Your friend,

Kemp

[Zee]

I don't know. It seems pretty hopeful and accurate to me (from one on the outside looking in, that is...), and although he didn't specifically mention to you that both parties were married to other people, he did mention it in his email, which is significant.
I don't think you mentioned you were already separated mentally from hubby or making plans in that area.  The way I feel about the situation (not that it matters) just seems so much better now that we've learned the mental separation was not due to the fling. This is such a good story, just keep us posted too - darn it.

And post daily, like a journal so we can have a good romantic read during work

I wonder if The Lion is working tomorrow, during the holiday. He is usually available on Keen during my work hours.

[chrys]

Well, I just made what I hope is my last call to anyone for awhile.  But something always happens to make me panic and I call someone else. I decided since you can never get into Uli's que that I would try Demi.  She said alot of the same things that Kemp said.  Said the man I am having a fling with is in love with me and having a hard time coming to grip with his feeling and the affair was going to continue.  She also hinted on the fact that my fling has not been intimate with his wife in over two years.  Something that he has been telling me but I as a women and a wife refuse to believe that they would not have some sort of sex life (birthdays, ect).  She also said he was jealous and is wondering on where his place is in my life.  This seemed weird because Linda from CP also told me that she felt he had been checking up on me and worrying that I may be with someone else.  Both kemp and Abrielle told me that he would be expressing his feelings to me in the first two week of January so I guess I do not have to long to wait.

[Pennylanexo]

Soooo chrys, what happened?? ☺

[chrys]

Soooo chrys, what happened?? ☺

Well, We have continued our fling.  He has not expressed his feelings to me in words.  He has shown me that he has stronger feelings for me. 

[bluebelle]

I read with him a few times...he speaks very fast and so far, it seems unrealistic that his predictions will come to pass..He seems very nice but I'm not sure about him..so far his date have been off.  I like that he send the follow up e-mail but what good is it if they situation never happens.