Hi guys-
I haven't been very active lately and it's mostly because I haven't liked the energy on this board in awhile. I am absolutely not pointing fingers or blaming any one person, so please don't take it as such. It's just as an Empath it's hard for me to 'turn off', and when I see all the negativity on this board I suck it up like a sponge. I will just say that I feel every one needs to really re-evaluate how they participate here. It's running the gamut from overly-instigative to overly-sensitive. I'm seeing a couple of passive-aggressive personalities on here, and mixing those with people who are not in a good place in their lives is just a powder keg.
Everyone really needs to take a day or so away from this forum and center themselves. Focus on YOURSELF. No psychic readings, no pining over lost connections, etc,. etc. I know it's easier said than done, but you guys all owe it to yourselves to focus on you for a minute. You all have been hurting for so long and spending your energy on people who have only hurt you/us ( me too. I'm just as guilty ) so take a couple of days to distract yourself with something you enjoy, or reward yourself with something. Your spirit has to break before you can become a much stronger, happier, healthier person. And I say we've all pretty much 'broken', so now it's time to rebuild ourselves. The Universe will not bring potentionally stressful people or connections back into our lives until it feels our spirit is ready for it.
That said, I've only had one reading in the past MONTH, and now I'm done. I finally had my reading with Sincerity- and it's the same outcome as all the others.
Now, tho, I realize how much energy I have wasted and how much suffering I have put myself through wishing for people who were cruel to me. IT'S THEY who have the problem and need to fix themselves, NOT ME, not any one of you. And for the past 2 years I have lived my life on hold, wanting these people to come back into my life. I lost a high-paying full-time job because of this, I have lost 'friends' because they don't want to hear me crying and depressed over some jerk anymore- I have given up A LOT for these two people in my life, and in return I have only been given silence on their part. I don't want to live my life any more based on these people. I don't want my worth to be measured by whether or not they reject me or come running back, saying they're 'sorry'.
Sometimes life puts people like them in our lives not because we're supposed to be with them forever, but because they are supposed to break us, and make us take a good, long hard look at ourselves and make the changes we need to make sure we live happy, fulfilling lives forever. My world REVOLVED around these two people, and my identity was based on their acceptance of me ( or lack thereof ).
Calling psychics is expensive, addictive, and can leave you in a never-ending cycle of hearing nothing but the same thing over, and over again. And you will force yourself to believe you're gaining new insight every time. Go ahead. Call a few psychics. Hear what it is that you need to hear. And then let it go. We're only putting our lives and our outcomes on hold. It's funny, but only when you truly let something go, does it come back to you. Someone hurt me more than 10 years ago and exited my life, calling me horrible things. It took 10 years later, when I had pretty much forgotten all about them, that they sought me out and apologized to me for their behavior and the hurt they caused. It took 10 years of thinking I would never hear from this person again, but once I forgot they even existed, I got the apology I was looking for. Sure, none of us want to wait 10 years for resolution, but things usually right themselves, even though it may seem like forever or never.
I absolutely mean no offense to any one here. We're all at different places in our journeys. I've just finally become disenchanted with it all. I sat down and thought long and hard, and realize all the things I gave up trying to get a couple of jerks back into my life - I lost a high-paying full-time job, I lost my home, I was hospitalized for the depression over it, etc. etc. and I was just appalled with myself that I let some people take these things from me. They didn't care. They still don't care, otherwise, they would have contacted me by now when my world was falling apart.
According to ALL the psychics I have called, these people will be back in my life, apologizing some day. I can be very forgiving, but I won't sacrifice my own life for these ingrates ever again.
So please, dear friends, I implore you. Take some time away and refocus on yourself. Learn to love yourself, and realize that no amount of psychic readings will help these people who have hurt you suddenly become better people. Focus on you, so that you can be strong when these people come back into your life, and you can make a good decision as to whether or not they should even be welcome back in your life. Or if they never come back, you'll need your strength for that, too.
As Sapphire once told me, anything that doesn't grow, dies. So take this time to grow yourself and give yourself the love and joys you deserve. Focusing too much on other people who only hurt us keeps us from growing, and keeps us from leading the lives we deserve.
Good luck to everyone. More than anything, I wish you inner peace.