This is just a rant which I haven't done in a while.
Since 2016, I would my life has been pretty shitty. There have been moments were things were okay but not necessarily amazing. I feel like my life has been stagnant in a sense that I feel like I have not really accomplished much and its not because I have not been putting in the work but because I guess I am not suppose to have it.
I feel like everyone around me is progressing money wise,career wise, relationship wise. I am still struggling in all those aspects. I no longer have hope. I feel like I have pushed my self each year saying next year will be good and each year I am just hit with disappointment.
Over the years I have slowed down on psychic readings tremendously and it could be due to me feeling I have found psychics that somewhat work for me or I'm just over spending large amount of money. But everyone and then I have a reading and its usually when I am feeling anxious and disappointed about life.
My go to reader has been Yona and Kiesha and sometimes lady P. I would say for the last 4 years I have read with them the most. Yona I have had faith in because she has gotten lots of things right for even big work and school predictions. Lat year, Yona expressed that I could get a little excited and how my life will be turning around. I started to be hopeful of that in November 2019. But then of course I was once again humbled.
I am in a living situation that I honestly hat and feel is unfair to me that I am trying to get out but yet I feel stuck because I have to pay for my school tuition, student loans, rent, retirement etc. That I can't even live in my own apartment. Im going too be 28 in September and I just feel like I should have been married by now in my own condo and I can't even get my own apartment let alone a man.
I had a POI who I had chemistry with which I hadn't had in a long time and I let him go because I didn't feel like things were progressing and Kiesha confirmed my suspicions. For the last month I had been so focus on work and moving that I wasn't hung up on the fact that POI and hadn't talked in a while but now I am feeling like crap. I thought after cutting things off on Tuesday that I would feel amazing and after an hour I felt horrible. I am not surprised POI didn't respond back , he's the type of person if you tell him to get lost he will he won't fight it. I am disappointed by this situation because I know him and how he can be that I expected him to be that way. I wanted him.
With work, I just hate my job. I hate the way people treat each other there. I feel like everyone is just either uncouth or just disorganized. On top of it , I am not even getting the pay that I deserve that matched my work experience. I have been fighting for a promotion since last year and in July 2019 I was told that I couldn't get it but I can take a test and I will most likely get it. Now, I am being told again I can't get it.
I just want a break. I feel so scared for my future that I just done see the rainbow at the end. I dont want to go through another year of heartache and disappointment.