Well, I'm getting through my first day after months of on-again-off-again binges that started again in March/April. For the previous 6 months, I was getting one really brief reading every week or two, mostly about work, which for me is really manageable. If I think about the money I spent on Keen in 2017/2018, I wouldn't stop throwing up.
Partly because none of my predictions are set to manifest until October/November but I have a moment now where I feel really in the flow of the universe and at peace and really just...well, at peace. I'm not looking for answers, I'm not dying because the POI hasn't called--he'll call when he calls-and I know he's thinking of me, and that's enough for right now. I have a legal hearing tomorrow and it's completely unphasing me.
I'm not pretending that I'm able to sustain this, but right now, I'm completely being unproductive with work--I just totalled up potential work commissions, tallied my debt from work being so crappy for so long, and I just think, for some reason, that everything is going to be ok. I don't know how or where or when, but money will flow, my guy situation will be fine--probably better than fine, and things will just be ok.
So, for right now--for my first day off keen, I feel a brief moment, that the dawn will break and it will be ok. I really want to enjoy this and hold onto it and pray that I can stay off keen for as long as I can--OR, be able to use in manageable, responsible way.
Thanks for reading.
