Still tired ---->>> THIS is really insightful ... "I think before all of this, I only saw value in what I could "do" to produce an outcome, and that was what drove me to keep trying to fix things that weren't working. And I thought of what I gave from within myself as "free" like listening, caring, etc. so I didn't see how much it was costing me to care about people who didn't care that much in return. Now I see that whatever I give of myself has value, and if I give too much away it has a literal cost to my life that requires extra time, money, and other resources to recover."
I spent an embarassing amount of money (like 6 digits embarassing) over four years. I couldn't really believe how people who said they care about me could behave towards me, and it blew me off-center really easily. I have had to learn how to be generous with myself first - it was hard, and that surprised and disappointed me. I thought I was in better shape than I actually was. I learned (still learning) discernment and how my generosity doesnt translate into other people being generous with me. So I watch for that now. I'm also much clearer about how sensitive I am and how that has to be cherished, protected and valued by ME. I gave people way too much credit and treated them like peers when in fact many dont have a clue what they are doing energetically, and I cant fix that. Knowledge hard won.
I have been here for quite a while, just reading. So first post here today and Still Tired, thanks.
