Feeling Bitter

[WinterElf]

I am going through a lot of emotions and anxiety while getting myself off of readings.  I feel like getting readings really mess up the energy or chances of being in a relationship.  I feel like something is wrong with me after talking with a psychic, like I will never be whole or good enough to have a man.  I workout , i am respectful to people, i dont cause drama, etc but I do have an air of apprehension when meeting someone. Usually i call a psychic before even going on the date.  No one is perfect so why is it that i see people with issues in loving relationships .. .for EXAMPLE...


My former teacher, a convicted child molester, is now in a relationship with this gorgeous guy who treats her like a queen.
A woman who dresses up as a goth has a man even when wearing pig snouts out in public.
The 300 pound woman who does not put much into her outer looks but has a great personaity has a cute guy.
My mom has a husband after her failed marriage with my abusive dad.
This woman who is okay looking but with a horrible personality/anger issues has a great guy.

Then there is me who has been told by psychics that the POI pulled away because of some minor thing I said or did... huh??

I am seeing all these people in relationships who are not perfect and go their own way and they have someone.  No one is perfect but when going to readings, i get this feeling from psychics that something is wrong with me as to why i am not in a relationship and the guy will always pick another woman over me.  It tears down my self esteem. 

How many people here got into a relationship while on psychic binges or calling psychics?   How many people here felt stable after calling a psychic ? Why is it every time we call them, there is some hidden issue or drama coming up?  I dont get it and I am so freaking frustrated as to why I never get into relationships when I go to psychics for advice and I am trying to stop.   

[WinterElf]

Oh and can you imagine for 20 years being told that "HE aint the one, the next guy is." Or "YOu will meet him in Spring in a park or at a function"  Again, being told this for 20 years is insane... Meanwhile the POI moves on with someone and marries them after the psychic usually tells me that he does not ever want to settle down and he wants his freedom or to just date. 

But then they are good at pegging down the present situation or the POI's personality.  Fancy cold reading?? I am so ANGRY about how I let this ruin my life.

[Love2lovenj]

Honestly you can't beat yourself over this.  Look at it as a lesson learned.  You know that these reading were like a ball and chain and now that you recognize it you can set yourself free.  Only you can do this.  You have the power to better yourself and life so don't keep yourself in this negative state and rise above it.  You can do it.  I honestly believe you attract what you are radiating.  So if you love yourself others will also love you.  If you are in a negative state of mind you will only be attracting negative things.  Mainly because you can't see the positive things around you.  Its the glass is half empty look of things. 

[WinterElf]

Thank you. I have been doing self love meditations this week and things were looking good but as soon as I got off the psychic reading binge, a lot of anger and self hate crept in.  I know it wont be easy but I will keep doing the self love meditations by this woman on youtube called Agnes. 

Thank you for your kind words.  I really appreciate it.

[doubleoh8]

Honestly you can't beat yourself over this.  Look at it as a lesson learned.  You know that these reading were like a ball and chain and now that you recognize it you can set yourself free.  Only you can do this.  You have the power to better yourself and life so don't keep yourself in this negative state and rise above it.  You can do it.  I honestly believe you attract what you are radiating.  So if you love yourself others will also love you.  If you are in a negative state of mind you will only be attracting negative things.  Mainly because you can't see the positive things around you.  Its the glass is half empty look of things.

@Elf, I was going to say much of the same. Know that now you've decided to stop, you can do it. You have set the wheels in motion by coming on here and stating your intention, as well as by writing about it and finding those techniques. Now try to be gentle with yourself and accept that there is a reason that you went down this path... and now there is the opportunity for a new path.

I know the advice of practicing self-love sounds so cliche and can be hard to do, but try to do small things that say 'I love you' to you. Gifts, baths, massage, little trips.... and as you do them think and feel love and kindness for yourself. And maybe instead of being angry at yourself and looking back at the 20 years, try to look forward and think 'I am so grateful that I see this for what it is now and I have a chance to start again'.

Not sure if that's a lot of help, but I just wanted to say something because your posts have helped me... and I appreciate your openness and courage for sharing your story.

[happyk]

Hey, I'm in your shoes too. I've been down the path of self sabotage asking myself the same questions. Apparently, life is so unfair. However, psychic reading is an addiction and you need a fix. For every negative reading, you want to get a positive reading to feel better. And the positive reading is not good enough, so we go to another reader. Things don't happen because we're too hung up on timeframes and results. Things will happen in Divine timing. Meanwhile everyone is getting paired up with amazing people and they're going on vacations and getting married and what not.

However, I'm trying to turn it around and you should too. I've started buying myself flowers and started meditation. And I'm forcing myself to do nice things for myself. It sounds weird but I've set myself time aside for crying lol. And coming to this site and reading about everyone's experiences kinda makes me feel like I'm not alone. Hang in there, things will get better.

[WinterElf]

Warning... this is a lot but this is the only place I can get it all out without judgement.  TY


Thank you again for your replies. I am doing meditations and the money i would have spent on a psychic, I went out to get my nails done. However,  I hate psychic readings with a passion even if i am addicted to them.  Two days ago a really accurate reader gave me another tarot reading and it was much worse than the original positive one that had lucky cards a month ago.  I wanted to scream and I asked her why are my readings getting worse?  I asked it in a polite way and as soon as I said that, she left the chat. 

Two years ago,I was madly in love with this guy who came to my town. He said how i was beautiful and smart and I could not believe my luck that I was attracted to someone who was attracted to me also because we all know how we can like someone but sometimes they dont feel the same way etc.... I was so caught up in psychic readings that I beat around the bush and lived in fantasy land.  He got with another girl who was abusive and they have a kid together.  When I found out he had a new girl,  I lost it.  I screamed and cried as I felt he was the one . I was never dramatic like that before.  I told him that I had feelings for him and he was so shocked.  He said that i never let on that I liked him for a relationship and he said i turned down two of his advances.  I didnt want to come off as easy so I got physically distant sometimes.  A few months later he said how he wished he knew i had those same feelings and how he wished he had waited for me instead. He is very unhappy now and joined the military to care for his new family. 

All the psychics said we would date and be together. When I called some of them back to say it didnt happen, a good number of them got defensive and even downright nasty.  One said, "He got with someone who knows how to treat him right and it's obviously not you!" then she slammed down the phone and blocked me.  I didnt even leave a bad review , i was emotionally spent.  This woman had very high ratings.  I feel like there are a lot of ratings that do not make it to their pages because people fear getting blocked if they were honest.  They just say that it was our fault, not a fake reading.


And then one other reader who I began to trust because of her very accurate timelines said that for the guy this year, we can be a couple etc I called a few days later and said, ooops looks like he has osme drama. You two will never be a couple.  I freaked out and called her back and then she changed her mind and said, it looks like it can work but an ex is coming back.  I called a week later and it was a negative reading.  As you can see, it drives you crazy, these readings.  I rather just not know, not expect, and save my money. 



I feel better reading your responses and knowing that I am not alone.  TO be honest, I would give myself tarot readings and they were way more accurate than any reading I ever paid for on Keen.  I threw the cards away though because the asking and addiction was diving me crazy. I had those cards for 15 years and they were so accurate for relationships but the anxiety about asking them would make me wait a few weeks before even touching them to ask the question. 

Five years ago, I was dating an investment banker who was insane lol but funny and we had a great vibe together.  I ran to psychics everyday and when i got too comfortable with the accurate readings, I didnt let things flow.  I was very late for a date and he cancelled me that night and I reacted badly and then he blocked me. Never heard from him again but psychics told me he was my soulmate etc
When I had a bf in 2017 psychics told me how he loved me and we would get married someday and to ignore his silence.  Found out on his social media he had a new girlfriend and when i called him , he lied and said it was a joke.  I called my "trusted" psychics.... they said he would come back and apologize to me.  HE NEVER DID.  They are still together and he blocked me on all social media.  Even the really famous ones said he would come back that year. HE NEVER DID.  HE NEVER CALLED AND LIED ABOUT ME TO HIS NEW GIRLFRIEND.   

ANd what hurts the most is when they say that the guy is not ready to commit and he commits to someone else.  This all sounds negative but I just want to get it off my chest and as a warning to not always take them seriously (psychics).  I confided in a coworker friend about my addiction and she told someone else about it and laughed about it.  She was happy when my POI ghosted me this week and then asked if iwas going to run to a psychic about it.  She was nice until she saw the picture of the POI and how we were dating and then she got jealous and passive aggressive.  I cut her off after she did those things.  Anyways, I enjoy reading your experiences also. Peace 

[Flyingsoul]

Hugs to all who need it Always have a thought that you will have a better day tomorrow

[WinterElf]

  Thank you