Help, please? 3 of cups as fear?

[user5942]

Hi, everyone!

In a tarot spread asking about separation and reunion, my POI’s FEAR card would be 3 of cups when we reunite. What does this mean exactly, like he is afraid I will involve him in a 3rd party? Any interpretation is appreciated!

[daughterofcups - P]

quickly- what was the question exactly as how you stated it? 3 of cups means a celebration, reunion of sorts..

but i would read the 3 of cups as fear in being that he is either afraid of being friends (3 of card is a very friend-ish card), or he is a afraid of you having someone else and him being the "third party" invovled- meaning hes afraid you have someone else that you'd be with already. it truly depends on surrounding cards as well. it could also mean he is afraid of you wanting to be "friendly" or "just friends"-- that you'll reunite and just want him as a friend.

other interpretations could be that he is afraid of getting too drunk or partying too hard (sometimes this card is a symbol for partying) , or it could mean he is afraid of your friends hating him, or his friends opinions or thoughts on reuniting with you.
those are more far fetched and i like the initial ones better, but again depends on surrounding cards

[user5942]

Thank you so much for all your help!! I asked, “What will happen when POI and I reunite?”

[daughterofcups - P]

Thank you so much for all your help!! I asked, “What will happen when POI and I reunite?”

oh. well in that case it means celebration, good times, party gathering etc. its a positive card. i wouldnt necessarily take it as "be friendly" or "be friends" because that is one of the meanings, again depending on other surrounding cards, but its a positive card to get because it literally means happy celebration/friendship/party/good times etc

[aquagirl]

if your questions is what will happen when you're reunited, then how does fear play in? what type of spread did you use?  do you remember the other cards?

3 of cups for me in a relationship reading is the "dating" card, it's about happy times and not stressing and not being to serious.

So his fear can be you won't take dating seriously. Or that he'll lose his freedom, as many commitmentphobes do.

Some read it as a third party, but doesn't mean that there is another woman/man, but it can be the fear of interference from a friend or your mom per say. Or that he may feel you still have romantic feelings for someone else and can swoop in and change your dynamic.

Generally this is a happy card , one of celebrations and good things, I've also read it as a desire for threesomes lol but again that all depends on the context of the reading.

[user5942]

Thank you all! I’m taking it as it will just be a fling involving physical intimacy since there are so many swords. I think of swords = penetration. We have a history of strong physical chemistry. Also that I will have control this time (3 of Swords and Magician) and I will not be overly forgiving since of past heartbreak and have power over my heart this time. (Maybe) he will be the one to be left this time around for another person (why his fear would be 3 of cups) and that he is expecting to be left in the cold (5 of pentacles)...Here is the way the spread goes:


Separation / Reunion (15 cards)

1 2 _ _ 3 4
_ 5 _ _ 6 _
_ 7 _ _ 8 _
_ _ 9x10 _ _ (ten crosses 9)
13 14__11 12
____ 15 ____

1-2: (read together) How you thought of them (during the separation) - Hierophant and 8 of Wands
3-4: (read together) How they thought of you - The Star and 8 of Swords
5: What you expect (from the reunion) - 9 of Swords
6: What they expect - 5 of Pentacles
7: What you fear - 8 of Pentacles
8: What they fear - 3 of Cups
9/10: Crossroads: The reunion itself. the 10 crosses the 9 as in the first 2 cards of CC. - 3 of Swords and Magician
11-12: (read together) What you bring away. High Priestess and 4 of Wands
13-14 (read together) What they bring away. Queen of Swords and Knight of Cups
15: The future of the relationship. 5 of Swords

[aquagirl]

I usually read wands as the "penis" cards lol, honestly way too many cards for this question.  sometimes a simple approach can be extremely telling. Also, be sure when you pulled for yourself that you weren't in a particular state of mind, because those swords could also be more of a reflection of how you feel or your own fears,  in the end one comes out the victor in this and the other feels like the loser.  Unless you actual felt that this was going to give you anxiety.  What did you actually want to know? the reason for the spread? 

[user5942]

Thank you, yes very true! This might sound a little strange I usually get myself in a clear state of mind (along with using sage and just sitting breathing in and out for a few minutes) and after like 2 glasses of wine to make sure I am open to the cards and much more relaxed. I asked, “What will happen when POI and I reunite?”

[Sooshi]

3 of Cups in this position could be read as the "fear of missing out", which I think is what makes it hard for a lot of people to commit to one person.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fear_of_missing_out

[user5942]

THAT IS GENIUS

[Love2lovenj]

Thank you all! I’m taking it as it will just be a fling involving physical intimacy since there are so many swords. I think of swords = penetration. We have a history of strong physical chemistry. Also that I will have control this time (3 of Swords and Magician) and I will not be overly forgiving since of past heartbreak and have power over my heart this time. (Maybe) he will be the one to be left this time around for another person (why his fear would be 3 of cups) and that he is expecting to be left in the cold (5 of pentacles)...Here is the way the spread goes:


Separation / Reunion (15 cards)

1 2 _ _ 3 4
_ 5 _ _ 6 _
_ 7 _ _ 8 _
_ _ 9x10 _ _ (ten crosses 9)
13 14__11 12
____ 15 ____

1-2: (read together) How you thought of them (during the separation) - Hierophant and 8 of Wands
3-4: (read together) How they thought of you - The Star and 8 of Swords
5: What you expect (from the reunion) - 9 of Swords
6: What they expect - 5 of Pentacles
7: What you fear - 8 of Pentacles
8: What they fear - 3 of Cups
9/10: Crossroads: The reunion itself. the 10 crosses the 9 as in the first 2 cards of CC. - 3 of Swords and Magician
11-12: (read together) What you bring away. High Priestess and 4 of Wands
13-14 (read together) What they bring away. Queen of Swords and Knight of Cups
15: The future of the relationship. 5 of Swords

I really enjoyed this spread and actually seemed accurate for my situation so thanks for sharing it.

[sjm1986]

Thank you all! I’m taking it as it will just be a fling involving physical intimacy since there are so many swords. I think of swords = penetration. We have a history of strong physical chemistry. Also that I will have control this time (3 of Swords and Magician) and I will not be overly forgiving since of past heartbreak and have power over my heart this time. (Maybe) he will be the one to be left this time around for another person (why his fear would be 3 of cups) and that he is expecting to be left in the cold (5 of pentacles)...Here is the way the spread goes:


Separation / Reunion (15 cards)

1 2 _ _ 3 4
_ 5 _ _ 6 _
_ 7 _ _ 8 _
_ _ 9x10 _ _ (ten crosses 9)
13 14__11 12
____ 15 ____

1-2: (read together) How you thought of them (during the separation) - Hierophant and 8 of Wands
3-4: (read together) How they thought of you - The Star and 8 of Swords
5: What you expect (from the reunion) - 9 of Swords
6: What they expect - 5 of Pentacles
7: What you fear - 8 of Pentacles
8: What they fear - 3 of Cups
9/10: Crossroads: The reunion itself. the 10 crosses the 9 as in the first 2 cards of CC. - 3 of Swords and Magician
11-12: (read together) What you bring away. High Priestess and 4 of Wands
13-14 (read together) What they bring away. Queen of Swords and Knight of Cups
15: The future of the relationship. 5 of Swords

I really enjoyed this spread and actually seemed accurate for my situation so thanks for sharing it.

Swords don't mean anything physical at all. They're completely mind cards. They're the only suit that doesn't have any physical component to it. So being so many swords, I would say means there's going to be a lot of thoughts and anxieties that aren't necessarily grounded. The 5 of swords as the future is probably the worst outcome, aside from death or the 10 of swords. The 5 of swords might even be worse since it's very heart wrenching but not an ending. So it's traumatic and something that should end but it doesn't. It still could if you looked at it further in time but that 5 of swords is just bad. Since you got the high priestess and 4 of wands though as for what you'll bring away, I'm thinking you'll still come out on top and have your dignity. The 5 of swords is basically an asshole who hurts people very badly who love him and he may or may not realize it but either way, he does it for his own gain. There are no feelings and usually the jerk doesn't give a damn about those that love him. It's come up for me basically every time I've been about to be cheated on or about to find out about it. The other part to it though, is that the people he hurt basically give up and they're like "whatever dude. Go enjoy your victory alone" and they're still hurt by it but they value love over whatever other crap got in the way so they're fine because at least they can live with themselves and they have a better future ahead of them since they're not assholes. So maybe that's why it was showing you still coming out on top even after the 5 of swords as the outcome. He ends up with a queen of swords but you are the high priestess here which means something since the HP isn't associated with a suit, but if she was, she wouldn't be a swords at all. And getting the knight of cups, I think what he takes away from it is pursuing a queen of swords. It wouldn't have shown up as another "person" card if it was both supposed to be you. I doubt he'll be happy for very long but I think the cards that are for what you take away are the best part of this reading. The outcome is bad but what you take away I think is the most important since it's the thing you're still with after the relationship is over. Or if it was a good outcome, it would be what you're left with out of the relationship. Either way, it's the only part of it that stays with you and those are awesome cards to get. I love the HP lol. She's my spirit animal

[ladya]

Thank you all! I’m taking it as it will just be a fling involving physical intimacy since there are so many swords. I think of swords = penetration. We have a history of strong physical chemistry. Also that I will have control this time (3 of Swords and Magician) and I will not be overly forgiving since of past heartbreak and have power over my heart this time. (Maybe) he will be the one to be left this time around for another person (why his fear would be 3 of cups) and that he is expecting to be left in the cold (5 of pentacles)...Here is the way the spread goes:


Separation / Reunion (15 cards)

1 2 _ _ 3 4
_ 5 _ _ 6 _
_ 7 _ _ 8 _
_ _ 9x10 _ _ (ten crosses 9)
13 14__11 12
____ 15 ____

1-2: (read together) How you thought of them (during the separation) - Hierophant and 8 of Wands
3-4: (read together) How they thought of you - The Star and 8 of Swords
5: What you expect (from the reunion) - 9 of Swords
6: What they expect - 5 of Pentacles
7: What you fear - 8 of Pentacles
8: What they fear - 3 of Cups
9/10: Crossroads: The reunion itself. the 10 crosses the 9 as in the first 2 cards of CC. - 3 of Swords and Magician
11-12: (read together) What you bring away. High Priestess and 4 of Wands
13-14 (read together) What they bring away. Queen of Swords and Knight of Cups
15: The future of the relationship. 5 of Swords

I really enjoyed this spread and actually seemed accurate for my situation so thanks for sharing it.

Swords don't mean anything physical at all. They're completely mind cards. They're the only suit that doesn't have any physical component to it. So being so many swords, I would say means there's going to be a lot of thoughts and anxieties that aren't necessarily grounded. The 5 of swords as the future is probably the worst outcome, aside from death or the 10 of swords. The 5 of swords might even be worse since it's very heart wrenching but not an ending. So it's traumatic and something that should end but it doesn't. It still could if you looked at it further in time but that 5 of swords is just bad. Since you got the high priestess and 4 of wands though as for what you'll bring away, I'm thinking you'll still come out on top and have your dignity. The 5 of swords is basically an asshole who hurts people very badly who love him and he may or may not realize it but either way, he does it for his own gain. There are no feelings and usually the jerk doesn't give a damn about those that love him. It's come up for me basically every time I've been about to be cheated on or about to find out about it. The other part to it though, is that the people he hurt basically give up and they're like "whatever dude. Go enjoy your victory alone" and they're still hurt by it but they value love over whatever other crap got in the way so they're fine because at least they can live with themselves and they have a better future ahead of them since they're not assholes. So maybe that's why it was showing you still coming out on top even after the 5 of swords as the outcome. He ends up with a queen of swords but you are the high priestess here which means something since the HP isn't associated with a suit, but if she was, she wouldn't be a swords at all. And getting the knight of cups, I think what he takes away from it is pursuing a queen of swords. It wouldn't have shown up as another "person" card if it was both supposed to be you. I doubt he'll be happy for very long but I think the cards that are for what you take away are the best part of this reading. The outcome is bad but what you take away I think is the most important since it's the thing you're still with after the relationship is over. Or if it was a good outcome, it would be what you're left with out of the relationship. Either way, it's the only part of it that stays with you and those are awesome cards to get. I love the HP lol. She's my spirit animal

lol i never associate swords with anything physical either. lol queen of swords is my spirit animal LOL and the empress. i know people associate QOS with air signs but who she is to me is the embodiment of scorponic energy.

[sjm1986]

Thank you all! I’m taking it as it will just be a fling involving physical intimacy since there are so many swords. I think of swords = penetration. We have a history of strong physical chemistry. Also that I will have control this time (3 of Swords and Magician) and I will not be overly forgiving since of past heartbreak and have power over my heart this time. (Maybe) he will be the one to be left this time around for another person (why his fear would be 3 of cups) and that he is expecting to be left in the cold (5 of pentacles)...Here is the way the spread goes:


Separation / Reunion (15 cards)

1 2 _ _ 3 4
_ 5 _ _ 6 _
_ 7 _ _ 8 _
_ _ 9x10 _ _ (ten crosses 9)
13 14__11 12
____ 15 ____

1-2: (read together) How you thought of them (during the separation) - Hierophant and 8 of Wands
3-4: (read together) How they thought of you - The Star and 8 of Swords
5: What you expect (from the reunion) - 9 of Swords
6: What they expect - 5 of Pentacles
7: What you fear - 8 of Pentacles
8: What they fear - 3 of Cups
9/10: Crossroads: The reunion itself. the 10 crosses the 9 as in the first 2 cards of CC. - 3 of Swords and Magician
11-12: (read together) What you bring away. High Priestess and 4 of Wands
13-14 (read together) What they bring away. Queen of Swords and Knight of Cups
15: The future of the relationship. 5 of Swords

I really enjoyed this spread and actually seemed accurate for my situation so thanks for sharing it.

Swords don't mean anything physical at all. They're completely mind cards. They're the only suit that doesn't have any physical component to it. So being so many swords, I would say means there's going to be a lot of thoughts and anxieties that aren't necessarily grounded. The 5 of swords as the future is probably the worst outcome, aside from death or the 10 of swords. The 5 of swords might even be worse since it's very heart wrenching but not an ending. So it's traumatic and something that should end but it doesn't. It still could if you looked at it further in time but that 5 of swords is just bad. Since you got the high priestess and 4 of wands though as for what you'll bring away, I'm thinking you'll still come out on top and have your dignity. The 5 of swords is basically an asshole who hurts people very badly who love him and he may or may not realize it but either way, he does it for his own gain. There are no feelings and usually the jerk doesn't give a damn about those that love him. It's come up for me basically every time I've been about to be cheated on or about to find out about it. The other part to it though, is that the people he hurt basically give up and they're like "whatever dude. Go enjoy your victory alone" and they're still hurt by it but they value love over whatever other crap got in the way so they're fine because at least they can live with themselves and they have a better future ahead of them since they're not assholes. So maybe that's why it was showing you still coming out on top even after the 5 of swords as the outcome. He ends up with a queen of swords but you are the high priestess here which means something since the HP isn't associated with a suit, but if she was, she wouldn't be a swords at all. And getting the knight of cups, I think what he takes away from it is pursuing a queen of swords. It wouldn't have shown up as another "person" card if it was both supposed to be you. I doubt he'll be happy for very long but I think the cards that are for what you take away are the best part of this reading. The outcome is bad but what you take away I think is the most important since it's the thing you're still with after the relationship is over. Or if it was a good outcome, it would be what you're left with out of the relationship. Either way, it's the only part of it that stays with you and those are awesome cards to get. I love the HP lol. She's my spirit animal

lol i never associate swords with anything physical either. lol queen of swords is my spirit animal LOL and the empress. i know people associate QOS with air signs but who she is to me is the embodiment of scorponic energy.

I'm a Scorpio and I've literally never been a queen of swords but the queen cards are more to explain how someone is "acting" as opposed to who they really are. The majors like the HP is actually a Scorpio in the traditional sense. Empress would be an earth sign but sometimes it just means "a mother". If queen of swords feels Scorpio to you then I think the universe will always give you her as a Scorpio. I think we get the cards that we've established a certain relationship to. It hits us all a certain way. But that's why I don't ask readers what cards they got to describe people or anything really. I think the universe gives THEM the cards that they resonate with and not me. So unless I know the reader well and the card they always get for a particular person, then it's hard to make any sense of the reading at all.