My Ex Came Back, After I Let Go.

[doubleoh8]

Nicely put. I like this.

[diamondcanadian]

I just wanted to come back because I’m a little flummoxed at the response my post has seemingly created.

I wanted to say a few things.

I did let go. In the way that if he moved on, I would be okay with that . I got to the point where I was and am happy with my life, my career etc and I felt at peace .

I also stated he came back.. that doesn’t mean that I accepted him back with open arms. That’s far from the case. I actually started seeing someone a little while before his contact again and I’m wobderjng if this is the case yona was talking about .. me having to choose . Because I’m still going on dates with this other guy - why should I give that up when he’s yet to show me any thing significant ? All he’s said is he wants to try ...

We’re  not dating , so I can continue my life and so can he. I’m still very unclear whether this is something I’m going to consider taking back . We have a lot .. a lot ! Of history . And that I’m worried about due to some things that have happened in the past.

[11jlady]

Kristina: How long has it been since you two initially broke up until he came back around?

[diamondcanadian]

A year . We were together for around the same time

[star1]

I just wanted to come back because I’m a little flummoxed at the response my post has seemingly created.

I wanted to say a few things.

I did let go. In the way that if he moved on, I would be okay with that . I got to the point where I was and am happy with my life, my career etc and I felt at peace .

I also stated he came back.. that doesn’t mean that I accepted him back with open arms. That’s far from the case. I actually started seeing someone a little while before his contact again and I’m wobderjng if this is the case yona was talking about .. me having to choose . Because I’m still going on dates with this other guy - why should I give that up when he’s yet to show me any thing significant ? All he’s said is he wants to try ...

We’re  not dating , so I can continue my life and so can he. I’m still very unclear whether this is something I’m going to consider taking back . We have a lot .. a lot ! Of history . And that I’m worried about due to some things that have happened in the past.

Sorry, I apologise if I upset you. Your posts are a little confusing, though. You did write just 2 days ago on the Aries Intuition thread that you are giving things a go with your POI, and now you're saying above quite the opposite and you're dating someone else. I did send you a few pm's to ensure I didn't upset you in my post. I wasn't just meaning you, there are others on here who say that they're moving on and then have told me at the same time they'd beat up any woman who goes near their POI, lol. I think people are becoming a little rattled because "readers" are coming on saying your ex will come back if you move on, but if someone moves in the hope that their ex will come back for that, then it won't work. You (and I mean generally speaking "you") have to move on because you want to move on, not to get the ex back.

We all are going to have different opinions on "moving on", like we do about LOA and destiny/free will, but I don't think it's right the way how these readers are scaremongering us to move on and it's going to get the ex back. People on here being in denial that they haven't moved on and worrying that it's going to bring their ex back.. Your ex will come back whatever you're thinking. It's coming upto Christmas and people are going to be low and thinking of their ex, reminiscing.

[star1]

My point is not to disbelieve anyone when they say their ex came back after they let go. Life often works out that way. I don't believe we can "cause" it to happen though. It just happens.

Many readers do advise it as a strategy, but their ideas about what it means to let go can be very manipulative, and can actually just keep us stuck.

That's my point, I'm not disbelieving it, I think it happens without us "causing" it. And I agree, it's a manipulative excuse from readers.. You put it in a better way than me, I'm not always good with my words.

[star1]

My point is not to disbelieve anyone when they say their ex came back after they let go. Life often works out that way. I don't believe we can "cause" it to happen though. It just happens.

Many readers do advise it as a strategy, but their ideas about what it means to let go can be very manipulative, and can actually just keep us stuck.

That's my point, I'm not disbelieving it, I think it happens without us "causing" it. And I agree, it's a manipulative excuse from readers.. You put it in a better way than me, I'm not always good with my words.

You said it as well as I did, or better. I feel like maybe it takes a lot of us repeating it because the temptation to believe what the readers say can be so strong.

Thanks, and yeah definitely. There's for sure been a sense of panic recently on the board after these "readers" coming on.

[star1]

Someone else said it about themselves, but I too seem to the be queen of nothing happening. I've never in my experience had "ex exes" come back, yet others seem to be lucky (or call it what you will) when their ex returns either after they moved on or flit in and out of their life..

I seem to be the woman who gets the causal guys who are only looking for hookups contacting me, not the "ex exes". A guy I was talking to in summer was in contact with me and made it clear he only wanted one thing. I stopped talking to him because we both wanted different things and I did begin to like him, so didn't want to get hurt. I forgot about him and he contacted me just over a month later, and I only recently saw the message from him. It is a nice ego boost at first, but then when you realise straight away they're just after a casual hook-up, you think "ugh". Another guy who also wanted one thing from me (and thought he could sway my decision) made contact with me around summer after no contact of 2 and a half years just wanting a hook-up, too. Men?! 

[sawthelight]

Someone else said it about themselves, but I too seem to the be queen of nothing happening. I've never in my experience had "ex exes" come back, yet others seem to be lucky (or call it what you will) when their ex returns either after they moved on or flit in and out of their life..

I seem to be the woman who gets the causal guys who are only looking for hookups contacting me, not the "ex exes". A guy I was talking to in summer was in contact with me and made it clear he only wanted one thing. I stopped talking to him because we both wanted different things and I did begin to like him, so didn't want to get hurt. I forgot about him and he contacted me just over a month later, and I only recently saw the message from him. It is a nice ego boost at first, but then when you realise straight away they're just after a casual hook-up, you think "ugh". Another guy who also wanted one thing from me (and thought he could sway my decision) made contact with me around summer after no contact of 2 and a half years just wanting a hook-up, too. Men?! 

you're not alone, so many guys are just after one thing, and so many try to get by with no commitment..so few good guys out there.  It's really hard to be single and looking for a quality partner.

[star1]

Someone else said it about themselves, but I too seem to the be queen of nothing happening. I've never in my experience had "ex exes" come back, yet others seem to be lucky (or call it what you will) when their ex returns either after they moved on or flit in and out of their life..

I seem to be the woman who gets the causal guys who are only looking for hookups contacting me, not the "ex exes". A guy I was talking to in summer was in contact with me and made it clear he only wanted one thing. I stopped talking to him because we both wanted different things and I did begin to like him, so didn't want to get hurt. I forgot about him and he contacted me just over a month later, and I only recently saw the message from him. It is a nice ego boost at first, but then when you realise straight away they're just after a casual hook-up, you think "ugh". Another guy who also wanted one thing from me (and thought he could sway my decision) made contact with me around summer after no contact of 2 and a half years just wanting a hook-up, too. Men?! 

you're not alone, so many guys are just after one thing, and so many try to get by with no commitment..so few good guys out there.  It's really hard to be single and looking for a quality partner.

Exactly, it's why I've given up on dating. So many men with commitment issues, grr.

[sparky]

I never had an ex come back.  Though I have only had 3 relationships in my life so I have a small pool to choose from but I do want the last one to come back.  1st one married the next person she dated after me.  I was okay with that because I knew at the time our short lived 3 month relationship wasn't something I wanted long term.  It ended mutually.  The 2nd was pretty rough.  She wasn't good for me and we were official for a year and unofficially together for another year.  I thought I wanted to be with her but really it was just that.  The thought was nice but she wasn't really the one for me.  Haven't talked to her in 8 years.  The last one we were together for just over a year.  Been broken up since March.  She is the only one that I would want to come back but we will see. 

I want to add that the closest I got to someone coming back was a girl interested in me that I wasn't.  I told her upfront and started to separate myself from her when she wasn't getting that I wasn't interested.  She ended up reaching out years later to see if I changed my mind, which I hadn't. 

[star1]

I never had an ex come back.  Though I have only had 3 relationships in my life so I have a small pool to choose from but I do want the last one to come back.  1st one married the next person she dated after me.  I was okay with that because I knew at the time our short lived 3 month relationship wasn't something I wanted long term.  It ended mutually.  The 2nd was pretty rough.  She wasn't good for me and we were official for a year and unofficially together for another year.  I thought I wanted to be with her but really it was just that.  The thought was nice but she wasn't really the one for me.  Haven't talked to her in 8 years.  The last one we were together for just over a year.  Been broken up since March.  She is the only one that I would want to come back but we will see. 

I want to add that the closest I got to someone coming back was a girl interested in me that I wasn't.  I told her upfront and started to separate myself from her when she wasn't getting that I wasn't interested.  She ended up reaching out years later to see if I changed my mind, which I hadn't.

This is my exact experience, but with exes/guys. The ones who you were never interested in seem to keep trying to push their luck over the years to see if you'll miraculously change your mind. Exes I think it's horses for courses. Some people seem to have their exes come back to check up on them, see how life's going, or have them back because things in their life aren't going so great since they parted with you. It's like some people will see UFO's, some won't. Some people will be psychically gifted and others won't. Some people will see bigfoot, others won't. I think it's just different strokes with luck of the draw with exes coming back. And I think most of the time it's no compliment when an ex gets back in touch.. I had a friend tell me her ex came back after 2 years of no contact because he was unhappy in his marriage.

[sparky]

I never had an ex come back.  Though I have only had 3 relationships in my life so I have a small pool to choose from but I do want the last one to come back.  1st one married the next person she dated after me.  I was okay with that because I knew at the time our short lived 3 month relationship wasn't something I wanted long term.  It ended mutually.  The 2nd was pretty rough.  She wasn't good for me and we were official for a year and unofficially together for another year.  I thought I wanted to be with her but really it was just that.  The thought was nice but she wasn't really the one for me.  Haven't talked to her in 8 years.  The last one we were together for just over a year.  Been broken up since March.  She is the only one that I would want to come back but we will see. 

I want to add that the closest I got to someone coming back was a girl interested in me that I wasn't.  I told her upfront and started to separate myself from her when she wasn't getting that I wasn't interested.  She ended up reaching out years later to see if I changed my mind, which I hadn't.

This is my exact experience, but with exes/guys. The ones who you were never interested in seem to keep trying to push their luck over the years to see if you'll miraculously change your mind. Exes I think it's horses for courses. Some people seem to have their exes come back to check up on them, see how life's going, or have them back because things in their life aren't going so great since they parted with you. It's like some people will see UFO's, some won't. Some people will be psychically gifted and others won't. Some people will see bigfoot, others won't. I think it's just different strokes with luck of the draw with exes coming back. And I think most of the time it's no compliment when an ex gets back in touch.. I had a friend tell me her ex came back after 2 years of no contact because he was unhappy in his marriage.

This is why I feel like with some psychics when they tell an ex coming back that they try to give that sense of false hope for those rare occasions because it makes you feel good.  I can say in my current situation that started me on this psychic quest that is what I felt.  That it is a sense of false hope even though I do have a gut feeling that my ex might reach out and even around the time they are predicting.  But if that does happen it would be an honest miracle.

[star1]

I never had an ex come back.  Though I have only had 3 relationships in my life so I have a small pool to choose from but I do want the last one to come back.  1st one married the next person she dated after me.  I was okay with that because I knew at the time our short lived 3 month relationship wasn't something I wanted long term.  It ended mutually.  The 2nd was pretty rough.  She wasn't good for me and we were official for a year and unofficially together for another year.  I thought I wanted to be with her but really it was just that.  The thought was nice but she wasn't really the one for me.  Haven't talked to her in 8 years.  The last one we were together for just over a year.  Been broken up since March.  She is the only one that I would want to come back but we will see. 

I want to add that the closest I got to someone coming back was a girl interested in me that I wasn't.  I told her upfront and started to separate myself from her when she wasn't getting that I wasn't interested.  She ended up reaching out years later to see if I changed my mind, which I hadn't.

This is my exact experience, but with exes/guys. The ones who you were never interested in seem to keep trying to push their luck over the years to see if you'll miraculously change your mind. Exes I think it's horses for courses. Some people seem to have their exes come back to check up on them, see how life's going, or have them back because things in their life aren't going so great since they parted with you. It's like some people will see UFO's, some won't. Some people will be psychically gifted and others won't. Some people will see bigfoot, others won't. I think it's just different strokes with luck of the draw with exes coming back. And I think most of the time it's no compliment when an ex gets back in touch.. I had a friend tell me her ex came back after 2 years of no contact because he was unhappy in his marriage.

This is why I feel like with some psychics when they tell an ex coming back that they try to give that sense of false hope for those rare occasions because it makes you feel good.  I can say in my current situation that started me on this psychic quest that is what I felt.  That it is a sense of false hope even though I do have a gut feeling that my ex might reach out and even around the time they are predicting.  But if that does happen it would be an honest miracle.

I completely agree. I am really confused about my situation because not one reader so far has outright said my ex won't be back. They all said he'd be back, but mostly it's not great. The really blunt ones have said for bad reasons, like to use me and answers along those lines. Aries and Yona see my ex coming back positively, I can't comment on Lady P and others yet, as I'm waiting on their reply.


When they all say your ex is coming back, you feel sort of stuck and really confused, especially from blunt readers. My situation is similar to yours in that I highly doubt mine will come back.. It has been a very very long time.

[sparky]

I never had an ex come back.  Though I have only had 3 relationships in my life so I have a small pool to choose from but I do want the last one to come back.  1st one married the next person she dated after me.  I was okay with that because I knew at the time our short lived 3 month relationship wasn't something I wanted long term.  It ended mutually.  The 2nd was pretty rough.  She wasn't good for me and we were official for a year and unofficially together for another year.  I thought I wanted to be with her but really it was just that.  The thought was nice but she wasn't really the one for me.  Haven't talked to her in 8 years.  The last one we were together for just over a year.  Been broken up since March.  She is the only one that I would want to come back but we will see. 

I want to add that the closest I got to someone coming back was a girl interested in me that I wasn't.  I told her upfront and started to separate myself from her when she wasn't getting that I wasn't interested.  She ended up reaching out years later to see if I changed my mind, which I hadn't.

This is my exact experience, but with exes/guys. The ones who you were never interested in seem to keep trying to push their luck over the years to see if you'll miraculously change your mind. Exes I think it's horses for courses. Some people seem to have their exes come back to check up on them, see how life's going, or have them back because things in their life aren't going so great since they parted with you. It's like some people will see UFO's, some won't. Some people will be psychically gifted and others won't. Some people will see bigfoot, others won't. I think it's just different strokes with luck of the draw with exes coming back. And I think most of the time it's no compliment when an ex gets back in touch.. I had a friend tell me her ex came back after 2 years of no contact because he was unhappy in his marriage.

This is why I feel like with some psychics when they tell an ex coming back that they try to give that sense of false hope for those rare occasions because it makes you feel good.  I can say in my current situation that started me on this psychic quest that is what I felt.  That it is a sense of false hope even though I do have a gut feeling that my ex might reach out and even around the time they are predicting.  But if that does happen it would be an honest miracle.

I completely agree. I am really confused about my situation because not one reader so far has outright said my ex won't be back. They all said he'd be back, but mostly it's not great. The really blunt ones have said for bad reasons, like to use me and answers along those lines. Aries and Yona see my ex coming back positively, I can't comment on Lady P and others yet, as I'm waiting on their reply.


When they all say your ex is coming back, you feel sort of stuck and really confused, especially from blunt readers. My situation is similar to yours in that I highly doubt mine will come back.. It has been a very very long time.

Just because it has been a long time doesn't mean that they will not come back.  So the psychics maybe right that they will come back.  Could be later than they predicted.  Even look at what a few have said in this forum about an ex coming back years later.  I heard of cases where an ex came back almost 10 years later, they got back together and married.  So don't count yourself out yet.  For mine I do see it as a long shot and that she might be gone.  But she is also the first ex that I have ever had a gut feeling of her coming back.  So time will tell.  In the meantime I am going to just live my life.