Alright guys, so it goes. During the "cleanse" I did have a few readings, but a few indeed. Only 1 with Cookie, Yona and LP (since I've never had a reading with them before, I was curious since so many of you left good reviews).
Also, I had literally miraculous occurrence at the end of January beginning of February: I had 4 of my exes reached out to me (NOT my last poi though, which is sad) and also guys I've never dated, asked me out and gave me a compliment enough to suggest that they would be open to something more than just dinner. I called it miraculous, because it literally felt like someone made a magic spell to attract guys to me, the irony is I lost all interest in anything romantic. I said, "NO" to all of them. Not because I wanted to get back at them, but because i feel like I run a veerrrrrrrrry long marathon for the last 4,5 years going after guys and at this point I feel like I'm not capable of investing any emotional energy into any type of relationship.
I FEEL BROKEN.
I feel so exhausted from these 4,5 years... calling psychics about these 2 guys, it gave me no happiness ina long run. I feel damaged and incapable of starting any relationship, I feel like I doubt any relationship worth it all together. It feels like I lost a believe in a magic worth it all between two people.
I don't call psychics anymore, I don't see the reason anymore. Many of them predicted happily ever after, but I can't help myself but look at this all with apathy, neutrality at best.