Well, things abruptly and unexpectedly ended between my POI and I for what I believe will be the final time yesterday and even though I was the one who ended it I am devastated for a lot of reasons. It's one of those situations where we say we will be friends but he seems to prefer to distance himself "for my benefit" even though I told him I don't want distance, I want to be platonic friends - it feels like he is just trying to wash his hands of me even though he says he cares. (Edit to clarify the situation for anyone not familiar: it was a 2+ year very confusing FWB relationship where he would often tell me he loved me although he told me once a long time ago in the beginning that he didn't think we would be a good match for actually dating - I held on and tortured myself because I loved him and deep down hoped things would change even though I knew better. I ended up with some major medical issues this year and in the last month or so it has greatly impacted our relationship, and I started being unable to contain my feelings of constant rejection).
I'm going back through my readings to see if there were any major clues regarding this happening - the only one that comes to mind offhand is a January reading, which she said would give a longer time frame than usual, where it pointed out that I was single and pointed out my POI and it said the relationship status would be changing, but it didn't say how - Yona assumed that since it pointed out that I was single that it meant that it would be changing in a way that meant increased partnership and intimacy - and it did sort of happen like that for a small period of time at one or two points over this year I suppose....but I wasn't really prepared for this to happen all of a sudden now. I mean, there still was no mention of the elusive "committment" in any of my recent readings, so I wasn't expecting miracles or anything, but I just didn't expect things to end with such drama the way they did. In all of my readings he has come up and Yona has always said she thinks based on what she sees that he might eventually commit.
If I find any other clues in my last few readings that I seem to have missed, will update....I'm starting to wonder if this event didn't show up because we really will remain friends at some point and therefore he isn't really gone from my life, it's just a change in the dynamic...who knows at this point, and I'm almost too sad to care right now.
Sorry for any negativity in my post, it's been a very rough last few days...